Faith and Resilience: The Story of a Mother’s Fight Against CHD

Keith Haney: 00:00:58

My guest today is Tracey Ripley. She is a wife, a devoted mother, and stepmother to four children.

Tracy is a child of God and attributes her strong faith to the trials she and her family have endured through her youngest son's battle with CHD.

Her testimony of faith has helped shed light on the world of CHD, spreading awareness and providing help to other families faced with a different path for their infant child than they might have ever dreamed. Tracy is a passionate advocate for children with CHD.

Her life experiences and many other obstacles her son has overcome throughout his own HCHD journey have awarded her the insight and knowledge she uses to help educate others and spread awareness about the leading cause of birth defects associated with infant illness and death. We welcome Tracy to the podcast. Well, Tracy, welcome to the podcast. How are you doing today?

Tracey Ripley: 00:01:55

Oh, I'm doing great. Thanks for having me.

Keith Haney: 00:01:58

So good to have you. I'm looking forward to this important conversation and the insight you will bring to my audience. So this will be a great conversation.

Tracey Ripley: 00:02:06

Looking forward to it.

Keith Haney: 00:02:08

I'm going to ask you my favorite question. What's the best piece of advice you've ever received?

Tracey Ripley: 00:02:14

Okay, the best piece of advice actually that I received, I received it probably 12 years before I really needed it. So I actually was at a company that I worked for. They were kind of doing a business development training and sort of a people skills training.

And it was a third party speaker that had come to talk to us and something he said has stuck with me. It was like 25 years ago. And he said that do not allow people to live rent free in your head or in your mind.

And you know, at the time when he said it, I was like, well, that's sort of an interesting take on things, you know, but really after my son, my youngest son was born with a congenital heart disease, I really struggled with guilt and anger and resentment and resentment towards others.

And that's when I really learned what he was talking about and how you can you give power to others over your thoughts, your feelings, and sometimes even your actions and maybe even keeping you from moving forward because you, you cannot let go or release that.

Keith Haney: 00:03:41

That makes so much sense. I use that a lot in my church too, especially talking about forgiveness because I had a congregation at just one church.

A lot of people struggle with this idea of letting go of past hurts. And I use that all the time. It's like they're living rent free in your brain. You are focused on them.

I said, I guarantee you, most of them have not remembered anything that they did or said to you. And you're just carrying this for no apparent reason and it's just hurting you versus punishing the person you think you're punishing?

Tracey Ripley: 00:04:10

Ultimately, yes, absolutely.

Keith Haney: 00:04:13

Yeah, I love that one. I'm always curious too. Who are some people in your life that have served as a mentor or even a inspiration for you on your journey?

Tracey Ripley: 00:04:25

Well, I've had a lot of mentors in my life. You know, of course my parents, grandparents are probably the very first mentors I ever had.

And actually because of them, that's where my foundation for faith and that where that comes from. But as an adult, I would have to say my pastor. So Pastor Susan, she has been my pastor for 25 years now.

She was at my son's bedside through both of his open heart surgeries. She has helped me pray through all of his healing. He's had actually eight total surgeries, 10 procedures in a 12 year.

You know, he's only 12 years old.

And she has been there through every step of it, helping with my faith journey and, you know, when sometimes I was struggling or maybe even angry at God, she has been a lifeline there and helped me along the way. I've also had mentors. You know, I spent 27 years in accounting and finance. So I've had some really good managers and bosses.

But if I had to pick one from that, that part of my life, it was actually one of the VPs of finance from the last company I worked for. And I, I would say he was a mentor not only in my journey as a finance manager, but his.

The things I learned from him helped me on this part of, you know, this end of my journey and as an author, because I learned not only confidence from him and learning that. So I was the only female finance manager on this segment I supported. And so I sat at the table with all men, leadership from the leadership team.

And he helped me to learn that as a woman, my voice mattered and that I had a different view on things, I had a different take or opinion on things. And sometimes I would sit quietly and not say anything. And he would say, you know, I need you to speak up.

I want you have a seat at this table for a reason. And you have a different take. And so I need you to share that. And so that was a very important lesson for me.

And the other thing I think he taught me was that as a finance person, you know, sometimes you're talking and you're giving results to people that are not financial. You know, they don't have the finance background or maybe they have A little bit. But he said, you know, you have to make the numbers interest.

You need to provide context and the underlying details to help them connect. So you can't just say, oh, yes, sales are up, you know, supplies up, demand's down.

Like finance people might get that, but non finance people are not going to understand. And so that's where he helped me.

And I took that knowledge and that learning and in my book so that when I built up my characters and I sort of gave the underlying details that I helped people to understand, how did I get to be the person I am? You know, I didn't just have a child with congenital heart disease and find the Lord, you know, I. And I kind of learned to give that that context.

So I would say those are two major influences in my life that helped me get to where I'm at today.

Keith Haney: 00:07:59

That's great because I think having help you learn to tell your story and speak out is so important because I know a lot of people think I don't have any value. What I have to offer no one really cares about. But we all have a voice and we all have a unique way of communicating that.

And God orchestrates and designs us in a certain way that we can say something that no one else can say in a way that only we can say it. And those voices are always important. So I'm glad he reminded you of your value.

So tell us about your family, about your journey as a wife, mother and stepmother.

Tracey Ripley: 00:08:36

band Rob and I, we married in: 1999

And so the first 10 years of our marriage, they were the only children that we had. And that was sort of purposeful.

At the time, I was still trying to get my degree and I was working at night, or sorry, I was going to school at night and I was working full time. So it didn't make sense for us to kind of add another child to the mix.

And when I finally got my degree, my husband and I decided, okay, we're going to try to have a child together. And of course, in my mind, I'm like, you know, this is when I want to do things and I want to be this old and I'm going to have this many kids.

And, you know, God said, no, that's not the way it's going to work. And. And so we went through a period of time of infertility, and it was a very hard struggle for Me, emotionally, it was very draining.

And I finally kind of just gave it up, gave it back to the Lord and said, okay, well, maybe this isn't for me. Me, maybe I'm not supposed to be a birth mother.

And my husband and I kind of switched gears and we started building a new house together, and he was building it himself. As I said, he's a carpenter.

And so we were focusing all of our time and attention on that, and we were not focusing on, you know, trying to have a child together. And then I started not feeling so good. I thought maybe I was tired, stressed out.

I had taken on a new role at work and all of the details of the build and. And then I found out I was pregnant.

And that was, for me, the first time that I really learned that patience is having faith in God's timing and that his timing is always perfect. And so four and a half years after that, my youngest son was born and our family was blessed. So we now have four children.

There are actually 21 years between our oldest son and the youngest son. So that kind of rounded out our little family. And very blessed to be a mother and a stepmother to all of them and now a grandmother.

Keith Haney: 00:10:59

Oh, congratulations. I know that experience.

Tracey Ripley: 00:11:03

Yes. I love that.

Keith Haney: 00:11:05

When did you first learn about your youngest son's congenital heart disease?

Tracey Ripley: 00:11:10

So I actually learned about that. He was 14 hours old. So the whole time I was pregnant, we had no issues. There were no concerns. There was a couple of flags when I.

Very early on, when I took one of the initial tests that they give you, but that even came back, you know, we had to do like, further testing, and that came back fine. So it wasn't until he was 14 hours old, and it was very happenstance. Like it was in my. In my. Actually, in my book, I call it God's grace. Because the.

What happened was it was like very early in the morning. It was probably like 6 or 7 in the morning. And a nurse had come in to take his vitals, and I didn't recognize her, so I thought she was my new nurse.

And she said, oh, no, we're having stacking issues, so I'm just helping out. So she was listening to, you know, checking his breathing and is listening to his heart. And she says, oh, he has a murmur.

And I'm kind of shocked and said, you know, that's interesting because you're the first one to say that. And he had been seen by several doctors, you know, several nurses, and no one had. Had said that.

And she says, oh, yeah, my son had A murmur like that, but he outgrew it. And so that kicked off because she caught that. She reached out to the cardiologist team, and they came and did an echo.

And then they were able to diagnose him with aortic sten stenosis. But it was a nurse who walked in my room who was not supposed to be there, but came in because of staffing issues and heard the murmur.

Keith Haney: 00:12:58

It's amazing how God does that, isn't it? Just wasn't supposed to be on this floor, wasn't supposed to be working there. And that person.

I saw something that, you know, no one else may have caught.

Tracey Ripley: 00:13:08

Yes.

Keith Haney: 00:13:09

As you think about, you know, what you had to go through with that, how did your faith guide you? Because I'm sure that just threw your whole life in a tizzy.

Tracey Ripley: 00:13:19

It did. You know, it's funny because, like, February was American Heart Month. And as a kid, I always participated in the heart challenge, or I think they.

When I was a kid, it was the jump for heart challenge, you know, and. And they raise money at the schools. That was my extent of knowledge about, you know, congenital heart disease or heart issues.

And I always attributed it to, you know, you needed to eat healthy, you needed to exercise. So. So I never really thought or. Or. Or knew anything about children who were born with a congenital condition.

And so that day, it threw me into a world of complete unknown. And, you know, it was. It was overwhelming, to say the least.

And, you know, I did do a lot of research and read a lot of statistics and things, which, you know, didn't help at the time because, you know, the statistics are always scary. And, you know, not very many children at the time were living to adulthood. So I wondered what my son's life was going to look like.

Was I going to see him grow up? Would I ever know what his laugh sounds like? I'm not going to cry. What his personality was going to be like. And.

And it was very hard in the beginning. And I. And I talk a little bit about this, or I guess I talk a lot about it in my book. My son ended up actually in heart.

He was in heart failure, and he went into heart failure at four weeks old. However, he was not. Let's just back up a little bit. So he went into heart failure, and we didn't know it was. I was able to bring him home.

So he was home with me. But I had noticed some strange breathing that I'm like, I don't think he's done that before. And I was home with him.

All day my husband was back to work. So like, have you seen him do this? And he's like, yeah, you know, I think I've seen him do that.

Well, I went to the pediatrician, had the pediatrician look at him. The pediatrician sent me back home, said it was, you know, normal. Babies sometimes have a, an irregular rhythm is kind of what he called it.

And you know, we went back to life as normal. A week later, he started throwing up every time I fed him. And you know, it was like really strange because it came on very fast.

And so I called the pediatrician again and I said, you know, I think I should bring him in. Maybe he's got some kind of stomach flu.

And because I have a 4 year old, my daughter was 4 at the time, we thought maybe she brought something home from preschool. So we go in to have him looked at and the pediatrician tells us he has acid reflux. And you know, it was strange because I said, well, usually.

And he even said, babies don't usually if they have acid reflux, they have it from the beginning, you know, so it was like weird that he had it all of a sudden. But I had a cardiologist appointment scheduled the next day. So he said, make sure you go to your appointment.

You know, like I go the next day to my appointment. And after they did the echo, my cardiologist says, we need to admit him.

And, and at the same, the same week, three days prior, my father in law had passed away. And so my husband wasn't with me at this appointment because he was with my pastor planning the funeral.

And so I start arguing with the cardiologist and saying, wait, no, you, you said that we were going to schedule this. I don't have time for this right now. You know, I, we have a funeral tomorrow or what was in two days.

And he looked at me and he said, you and your husband go do what you need to do. He will be here in good hands, but he needs medicine now. And I could tell him like, he has never spoke to me this way.

You know, he was always soft spoken and I'm like, you know, now I know it's serious. And I looked him straight in the face and said, is he going to die? And my cardiologist said, he is very sick and he needs medicine now.

So they let me carry him over to the PICU and they admitted him and they told me that he needed, they needed to start this PICC line. They were going to put it in his leg, but they said, we only have one try.

If they can't set it, then they won't try in the other leg because they need the other leg for the balloon calf, which is the surgery they were going to do. And so I, you know, they go through this whole thing of all the risks and worries, you know, and what choice do I have? I have no choice.

Like, what's the alternative, right? So by this time now my husband has shown up and we both kind of go out of the room because I didn't want to make her nervous.

You know, you do what you need to do. And we went out in the hallway and I prayed, right? And we come back and she said, okay, you know, the medicine's in. She got it started.

And they started this epinephrine, epinephrine drip, which was supposed to kind of regulate his heartbeat because his heart rate, which they didn't tell me this at the time. I learned later he had 12% heart function. Wow, 12%. So they needed to get his heart stable to even be able to go into surgery.

So that night then, my husband stayed as long as he could, but he was busy. Like I said, he was still grieving. He needed to still write the eulogy.

My 4 year old daughter was at home and, you know, she had just lost her grandfather and didn't understand what was going on. She's like, last time grandpa went to the hospital, you didn't come home. Now Bryson, you were at the hospital. Are you guys not going to come home?

You know, so he, he went home to be with our daughter and, and so I stayed at the hospital alone because he needed surgery. They weren't allowing me to feed him. Well, I was nursing and so my son like could sense me and he'd like start rooting.

I don't know if you've heard when babies root and they kind of, they turn their heads and he's crying because he's like mad. Like the food's right there, why don't you just feed me? And I couldn't, they wouldn't let me.

So they put like blankets and pillows between us to sort of offset that. And, you know, eventually my son just stopped crying. He, he wasn't trying to eat anymore.

He just lay there in my arms real quiet, not really even making noise. And I wouldn't put him back in the bed. I just kept holding him.

And so the nurse, now it's like three in the morning, the nurse goes out, she's doing her charting or, you know, whatever, whatever she needed to do. And I'm sitting alone in the Dark, praying over my child. And, you know, I could have felt alone. I could have felt despair.

And like, why is this happening to me? Why. Why me, Lord? Why? You know, please save my son instead, I did not let fear come into that room. I prayed to God and I thanked him.

I thanked him for that nurse that found the murmur.

I thanked him for the nurse that set the picc line, for the cardiologist who diagnosed him, who saw me that day and wouldn't let this mom who was arguing that, no, not today. I don't have time for this. And he wouldn't take that. And he said, no, no, you go about your business. We're going to take care of your son.

And I thanked him for the cardiologist. And I thanked him that I had a job and access to healthcare so close to home. And I think that night was a pivotal moment for me with my faith.

That's really where my faith kind of just bloomed and I started just trusting in the Lord. And when fear crept in, I would just pray and. And try to come at it with a heart of gratitude and.

And thanking him for the blessings that he had given us.

Keith Haney: 00:22:10

Oh, that's. That's amazing story, Cal, because it's like you. You could have gone into the deep place, dark place of, why me, Lord? This isn't fair.

But to turn that into God, you've been. You've been here with me this whole time, even though I didn't see it.

You sent people into my life at just the right moment that have given me good advice, and you are taking care of me. So I appreciate that, which I want to kind of dig into. I think this kind of led to your book, if I'm not mistaken, the Prayer for Warrior Mom.

Tell us about what inspired you to write this book.

Tracey Ripley: 00:22:45

Okay, so that was a very strange story. And I know when I say it, people are. They may believe me and they may not, but my son was 10 years old. He had already went through.

He had the balloon calf, the one that. He had already had a open heart surgery at 4 years old.

And during this whole time, I was moving up the career ladder in my finance career, and each move meant more responsibility, more time away from my family. And as you can imagine, with caring for a child who has a chronic condition, it really put me at.

I constantly felt like I was at a tug of war of wanting to progress in my career and do well for the people I worked for and my team at work, but also wanting to be, you know, the mom my. My child need my children needed my, the wife that my husband needed.

And so I kept praying and, and telling God, I don't, I just feel like this isn't, this can't be my purpose in life to be tied to this laptop. And you know, and I kept asking him, please Father, show me how to share your light and you'd love with the world. I kept praying that for years.

I kept praying it. Well, then things changed drastically at my work. We went through four CEOs in about a 15 month period and it was very intense.

There was a lot of demands for reports and things, especially from the finance team. Sometimes we would need them. Like we need this by 3:00 clock. And it doesn't matter what other priorities you have, this is first. And then why not?

You would say, oh, so the other things that I had do today, does that need to be tomorrow? Oh no, no, no, you still need to do those today, but this one comes first. And, and it was, you know, every day like that, it was constant.

So we were constantly under this, this stress and I just kept feeling like I, you know, I can't do this to my family. My son was, you know, young. My daughter, they, they're still in school. And so one night, it was about three in the morning and I awoke to it.

It felt like a dream, it felt like a thought. It was very strange, you know, like, did I think that, did someone say that? Like, you know, and it said, use your 401k.

And I was like, this is strange. Like, what do you, what. You know, I kind of pushed it aside and, and didn't really think about it again for about a month.

And then I started getting inundated with flyers and things by our, by my employer about learning about our pension and going to these classes about our pension and being educated.

Well, I ended up signing up for this pension class and wouldn't you know, the very first example, the very first slide, they're talking about a woman who is 50 years old who takes a early retirement. And you know, it obviously says there's tax implications, so I'm not going to get into that here.

But I thought it was very strange because I'm like everything I had been told up until that moment that I was not able to touch my pension until I was 55. And I'm like, so why is this? I'm like, that has to be a typo. She, you know, 50. They, I was 49 and about to turn 50.

So you know, I'll fast forward a bit. I had some meetings with my financial advisor, talked through it, learned a lot about the whole role of 55.

Anyways, I ended up telling my employer that I was going to take this early retirement. And two weeks later I found out my son was going to have to have another surgery.

Which at the time we thought, okay, well, we were told if he had to have another surgery, it would be through his leg, not open heart. Well, I found out, no, it was going to be another open heart surgery. So then I thought, okay, this just confirmed that I needed to do this.

I needed to step away from this stressful job so I could be with my son through this. And after my son had the surgery a few months later and he was back to school, I'm now thinking, okay, what am I going to do now?

What is, what, what is my life going to look like? I don't necessarily want to go back to what I was doing. I certainly don't want that, that stressful job.

And then again, at three in the morning, I awoke to a dream or a thought that said, you should write a book. And I was like, what? Who's going to want to read my story? You know, like, who? There I go again, questioning my worth.

But that thought wouldn't leave me. Like I couldn't stop thinking about it. And so then I started researching, you know, how do I self publish?

And, and so that really was what pushed me to share our story and to actually get it out there and publish my own book.

Keith Haney: 00:28:26

Wow, what a powerful story. So tell us how you have become an advocate. Because I know going through this you start to understand and have an insight that some people don't.

So for the parents who are going through a similar situation, what words of wisdom do you have for them?

Tracey Ripley: 00:28:47

Well, how I got started as an advocate, I would say first of all was when, when my son was born. In fact, I wasn't really even on social media. I didn't even do Facebook until my son was born.

And mostly it was because I had so many people would come up to me when they found out, you know, my son had a heart issue. And they would ask me, oh, well, he had surgery that I'm so great that, you know, he's cured.

And then I'd have to exclaim, well, you know, it's, it's his whole life. Like he's probably going to have multiple surgeries and it's not a one and done thing.

Or some people would kind of, you know, if as he got older and after he had his first surgery, sometimes he would be playing and he would be dripping and sweating. His face is red. And we would say, you need to come over here and sit down and get a drink.

And then I would get this unsolicited advice that would tell me, you know, oh, just let kids be kids. They're just being kids. You know, like I was being a helicopter mom, and it was somebody who didn't really know our story.

And I remember getting angry and like, well, are you to tell me, you know, And. And. And then I realized that, well, they don't understand that they. Unless you have lived it or walked in our shoes, you just don't understand.

And so that's when I really started advocating. And that's really what I tried to do with my book, to help people understand and also to help a new mom.

So I tried to think about if I was me when, you know, 12 years ago, when we were first starting out, knowing nothing, what would I say to that? What would I say to myself?

And so that's what I tried to convey in my book, to help them understand and also to give them tools, because that way they don't have to learn the hard way, as I did, to set healthy boundaries. And that can be at work and at home.

Because sometimes, you know, when you have a child that has a chronic issue and you have to tell somebody, you can't come in here if you're sick.

And now, granted, this was before the whole Covid thing, you know, so sometimes when I would tell people, no, I can't take him out in public because we can't risk him getting sick, and they would be like, what do you mean you can't take him out in public? So helping new parents understand how to cope with that, how to understand that, you know, people aren't really trying to be malicious. They're not.

They're not being insensitive. They just don't understand.

And helping them to prepare their mind so that when they hear those kind of comments, instead of maybe giving a snarky comment like, who are you to tell me my kid can't do that? But. But to say, well, you know, he. He's had heart surgery, and so he's not allowed, you know, because they don't know.

And I often call CHD the invisible disease, because unless the child. Unless you can see their scar, which sometimes, depending on the shirt, you can see my son's scars.

But other than that, you wouldn't know it to look at them. And so it's. It's easy for people to make assumptions, and for parents to feel hurt, because it's not that people are being uncaring or that.

But I did try to share that in my book.

And as I mentioned about that, setting healthy boundaries, I had to also learn to focus on things that I could control and not like everything else that was out of my control, that's in God's hands. I gave that to God and let him run that. And I had to learn that lesson the hard way. Sometimes. It took me multiple times to learn, and.

But those are the lessons that I try to help others. And I'll leave the last thing, which I think is probably the most important that I learned and that I hope to convey.

I have a whole chapter in my book dedicated to learning about forgiveness and learning to let go of that anger and that resentment, to give that to God. Because that, for me was. That was such a healing journey and a process. And it is not overnight. You know, it is a journey.

And sometimes there are good days and sometimes there are bad days, right? But learning to forgive, not only myself, because I blame myself for not pushing hard enough for the pediatrician.

I blame myself for not calling the cardiologist myself and saying, hey, did you know that we were in? Because the pediatrician had not told the cardiologist. I had a lot of anger and guilt towards the pediatrician, and I had to let all of that go. And.

And when I did, it was almost like. It was almost like I was a different person. I felt like I could finally love my children the way I was, the way I wanted to.

I wasn't snapping at my husband and then realizing, like, oh, that sounded worse than I intended it to, and not really realizing why I was doing that, but it was because out of the heart or out of the mouth, the heart speaks, right? That's what scripture tells us. And I had to learn that all of that anger and resentment was what I was giving back to the people I loved.

And I didn't want to do that. So learning to forgive and let go helped me to. To be a better mother, be a better sister or daughter, parent and wife.

Keith Haney: 00:34:45

So how is your book being received?

Tracey Ripley: 00:34:49

Well, it's doing quite well. It's been a year now that it's been out in the market. I've sold about 420 books, and I'm getting a lot of great feedback. And I think the.

One of the big things that really gives me some joy or that were surprising to me are the moms that reach out to me that message me, you know, maybe they're not friends with me on Facebook, but they find me or they saw my book in one of the heart mom groups and they reach out and tell me the stories about how my book has helped them. If, if I may share just a little story. Sure.

This one lady, when I first published my book, brought me to tears because she said that she kept seeing, I think it was an ad for my book. She said every time I get on Facebook, I see, I saw your book. And she said I would swipe it away because she said I was too angry at God to pray.

And she said I kept feeling prayers are not going to fix my son. And she said every time she would get on there, it would be on there again and she would swipe it away.

And then one day she said, she said, I decided to read your book for the heart aspects, but not for the faith aspects. And then she told me that as she read my book, there were so many similarities. Her husband was in finance.

She had a four year old daughter at the time, or I don't think she told me this. So for four year old child, at the same time that her child was born, was also diagnosed with severe aortic stenosis.

She said that she wished she would have started writing down all of the similarities because there were so many. And she said that she felt like she was reading her own child's journey and their, their story, but getting a glimpse of their future.

And she said it was the first time since he was born that she was able to be at peace and not wake up in the morning angry at God. And that was finally able to, you know, open her Bible and pray again. And I just thought that was wonderful.

Even if, you know, she was the only other person to tell me that at least I knew my book touched and changed one person's heart and maybe had them turn back to God.

Keith Haney: 00:37:24

What an inspiring story. It makes you feel good to know that God used you to touch her heart.

Tracey Ripley: 00:37:29

Yes, absolutely.

Keith Haney: 00:37:30

So I'd love to ask my guest this, this other question. What do you want your legacy to be?

Tracey Ripley: 00:37:37

Oh, that's a tough one, right? My legacy. Well, I mentioned how, you know, I prayed to God and asked him to use me to help me spread his light and love in the world.

And I hope that when I'm no longer here that my story will, will continue to be shared and will help lead others to, to either want to know the God that I serve or to bring them back.

Maybe they've strayed away or maybe they, you know, some church hurt led them to leave, but that that something I shared or something they read in my book turn their face back to God so that they could know the love and the grace that have blessed my life. And I hope that that continues when I'm not, when I'm not here.

Keith Haney: 00:38:39

That's beautiful. I love to ask you, as we kind of wrap up this great conversation, what key takeaways do you want the listeners to gain from our conversation?

Tracey Ripley: 00:38:53

Well, I would hope, I hope that one that they want to learn about God and Jesus and to dig deeper into that, to open their Bible.

I hope that they will, will see that, you know, when you have something in your life, a challenge or, you know, for me it was both work and my, my son's chronic illness that you're not alone. And that like, I'll, I'll.

I'm going to use an example for me when I, the, the beauty of writing your book is when you turn around and look at your life and you're trying to like, see it from a different lens because you get the beauty of hindsight, right?

And I look back and I think all of the moments in my life where I felt alone, where I would felt it was the most darkest, the most times of where I could have just said, I can't, I can't put another foot forward. All of those moments were moments when I had let things of this world distract me.

And I was so busy just doing, so busy working, so busy, you know, worrying about my son and what his future was looking like. And I was not walking with God.

I was not reading my Bible, I was not going to church because I was too busy, or I was not, you know, listening to my worship music or I was not praying and talking to him every day, those are the moments when I felt the most despair.

And so when, when you are in those moments, instead of feeling alone and feeling like you don't have anyone to walk this with you, I hope that from this conversation that they will learn that they're not alone. And if they just take God's hand, he is waiting, he is extending it, but you have to invite him in.

Keith Haney: 00:40:57

I love that. That's a beautiful message. Where can listeners find your book, the Prayerful Warrior mom and connect with you on social media?

Tracey Ripley: 00:41:07

So it is available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble.

I do sell it directly from my website, which is prayerfulwarrior.com and if you go to my website, you'll see all of my social media handles are available there. I'm on Pinterest, Instagram, Facebook and Twitter, or I Guess it's called X now.

Keith Haney: 00:41:29

Some of us still call it Twitter.

Tracey Ripley: 00:41:32

Yeah.

Keith Haney: 00:41:32

So I'm sure everybody's going to want me to ask this question. I'm sure they're all kind of dying, you know. How is your son doing today?

Tracey Ripley: 00:41:39

Oh, he's doing amazing. Very resilient. He has such a positive attitude, and for the first time ever, he got to play basketball.

Now, we did have to adjust a bit because, you know, that obviously that's a sport with lots of running. But we were very fortunate and blessed to have coaches that worked with him, that knew and paid attention.

If he needed to get a break, they would pull him out and sit him.

And that was such a blessing because, you know, when my son had his balloon cap at five weeks old, we were told then that he would never play coach sports. And for him to play basketball this year was just, you know, I didn't even care if he ever made a basket.

I was just rooting for him because he was on that court and he was. He was able to play.

Keith Haney: 00:42:36

Wow, that's neat. Thank you so much, Traci, for sharing your story and encouraging us.

And to remember that, you know, even when things look bleak, know that God's always there. He's never abandoned us, never forsaken us. He's always there.

And just that moment of you looking at the ways God is blessing you in that moment kind of makes us remind ourselves that in those times, look for what God is doing, not what you think God hasn't done as a reminder. So thank you for that reminder.

Tracey Ripley: 00:43:06

Thank you for having me. I really appreciate that. I've enjoyed the conversation.

Keith Haney: 00:43:11

Well, God bless your journey and the work in your son. And maybe he be the next Michael Jordan.

Tracey Ripley: 00:43:18

I don't know about that. Yeah, I'm glad he's on the court, right?

Keith Haney: 00:43:22

Yeah. God is good.

Tracey Ripley: 00:43:25

Yes, he is.

Keith Haney: 00:43:25

Thank you so much again.

Tracey Ripley: 00:43:27

Thank you.