Leading with Love: Kathy Gardarian’s Journey in Business and Leadership
Join Keith Haney as he interviews Kathy Gardarian about her inspiring experiences in entrepreneurship and leadership. In this episode, Kathy emphasizes the importance of leading with love in business and the pivotal role of relationships in achieving success. She shares her journey, which role models, mentors, and the World Business Academy influenced.
The conversation delves into the challenges women face in business and the need to find common ground between genders. Kathy recounts a transformative experience with the Dalai Lama, highlighting the power of focusing on what you want to see in the world.
Kathy discusses her book, The Wisdom of Love and Business, which offers transformational tools for entrepreneurial success. She underscores the importance of inner work, forgiving oneself and others, and approaching difficult people with love. Kathy encourages entrepreneurs to lead with kindness, compassion, and mindfulness, highlighting the significance of storytelling and sharing experiences to inspire and teach others.
This episode is a call to live with kindness, compassion, and mindfulness and to think bigger in our lives.
Tune in to this enlightening episode with Kathy Gardarian and discover how leading with love can transform your business and leadership approach. Learn from Kathy’s experiences and insights to embrace kindness, compassion, and mindfulness in your entrepreneurial journey. Don’t miss this opportunity to be inspired and think bigger in your life and business!
Transcript
Well, Cathy, welcome to the podcast. How you doing today?
Kathy Gardarian (:Very well, thank you. It's nice to be here.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Good to have you on. I'm looking forward to our conversation. Love talking about entrepreneurship and leadership. So two of my favorite topics.
Kathy Gardarian (:Great.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I love to ask my guests this question. What's the best piece of advice you've ever received?
Kathy Gardarian (:You know, I think it's that basically that business is relationship and you have to lead with love. When there's just room for the human spirit in the equation, really things just go, there's so much more productive and really actually more profitable. It's just easier to get along and it's just more authentic. You drop the barriers, you know, it's nice. Yeah.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Basically this.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I love that. I'm always curious people like yourself who've achieved a certain level of success, we don't get there by ourselves. So who were some role models for you and maybe some mentors along your journey? You want to kind of tell us what made them special and just kind of give them a shout out, give them a thank you for their involvement.
Kathy Gardarian (:Okay.
they know, but I do want to say that I had a lot of personal friends that talked to me a lot about my situation at the time. And I did listen to them because they were successful already and they made a lot of sense. And I can tell you more about that when I tell you my personal story, but probably the biggest influence later was.
something called the World Business Academy. And it was an academy of all CEOs. And I had to fly up from Southern California to San Francisco every month for the meeting. And I didn't miss a meeting in 22 years, and we had them all over the world because it was so valuable to have the authentic, real people that wanted to put spirit into business.
and ethics and morals and to really care about people and to be the change we wanted to see in the world, especially in business. So I'd say the World Business Academy. Yeah.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I noticed that I don't see as much of that in business anymore. Why is that shifted? Or maybe I'm just missing it.
Kathy Gardarian (:Well, no, I agree with you. And I, you know, in my story, really, you know, I'm, I was so, first of all, my story is that I didn't even think about having my own company. I wasn't, I was an independent contractor. I was doing sales and I was working for these five men in LA that owned a company and.
I was unfortunately the only female salesperson in the company. So they'd closed the door of the sales meeting and the president of the company was there, there's like 30 guys and me in the room. And he would say, well, while you ask Cathy, he has the highest sales totals again this month. So how do you guys like being beat up by a skirt? And he used to all these things about taking women and putting them lower than men.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:And he would say.
So how do you guys like to be helped by a spark? And he used all these things about making women and putting them lower than men. And I'm not saying that it still doesn't go on, but I think it's a little bit better. I'm not sure you can say that with a nice smile.
Kathy Gardarian (:And I'm not saying that it still doesn't go on, but I think it's a little bit better. And I'm not sure you could say that anymore to someone. And then I remember one time we were standing in the warehouse, because it was a distribution sales company. And there were so many products all around. And I was looking at him. And he looked at me and he said, you're a woman. You could never do this. And he looked around at everything. And I remember going home and.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:one time you were standing in the warehouse because it just could be a chain sales company and there were so many products all around and I was looking at it and he looked at me and he said, you know, you're a woman, you could never do this. And I remember going home and...
Kathy Gardarian (:And here's the real key that one of my friends just couldn't stop talking about. He said, Kathy, you're the highest sales person in there. You're getting no respect for who you are, nevermind your gender. But they kept, I wasn't an employee, I was an independent contractor. And they kept two thirds of the money and I kept a third. And I was making them a lot of money and they were going, you don't need them, they need you. Why don't you start your own?
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:And here's the real key that one of my friends just couldn't stop talking about. He said, Kathy, you're the highest salesperson in there. You're getting no respect for who you are, never mind your gender.
I was an employee, I was an independent contractor. They kept two -thirds of the money and I kept a third. And I was making them a lot of money and they were going, you don't need them, they need you, why don't you start your own? And that sort of planted the seed. And I'm sorry to say it took me eight months later to leave, but I had so much fear and I wrote in my book about never staying for the money because I thought I was
Kathy Gardarian (:And that sort of planted the seed. And I'm sorry to say it took me eight months later to leave, but I had so much fear. And I write in my book about never stay for the money because I thought I was making a lot of money. And so, you know, you finally have to get to where I said, I can't even walk into that office anymore.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:And so you finally have to get to where I said, I can't even walk into that office anymore. I feel so needed and not heard and not listened to. And so I think out in the world, some of that is still going on. And in their case, I think I'll be bold to say, I think some men are really afraid of women. And we should find a way to find some common ground between the two of them. So.
Kathy Gardarian (:I feel so demeaned and not heard and not listened to. And so I think out in the world, some of that is still going on. And in their case, I think, you know, I'll be bold to say, I think some men are really afraid of women and we should have a way to, you know, find some common ground and treat each other well. So I would say anyway, finally, when I left,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So anyway, finally, when I left...
Kathy Gardarian (:and started my own company, I would say that I wasn't a CEO for more than a year, a little over a year. And I read this article by Willis Harmon, a great scientist at the Stanford Research Institute. And he said, all these business people are coming over to the Stanford Institute and they want to talk about having business with...
science in business, spirituality in business. And I finally told him, I want you to start something where people can come and talk about that then, because they kept coming over and you know. So he joined too, even though he said at the time, he had the same view of business that a lot of people do. But as we got together, and as reading this article on a Saturday, and I was getting so excited, I knew in my gut that this was the place for me, because,
In Orange County, California at the time, this was the late 80s, the dialogue was up here and I needed to go here. And so I was so excited. I couldn't wait to call Willis on Monday because there was no way, I didn't know how to reach anybody. And I talked to Willis on Monday and I told him my story and he said,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I went to Willis on Monday and told him my story and he said, I think you'd be perfect for the Academy. I'll have the president of the Academy call you. So a couple days later, the president called me and we were talking and he was starting to kind of brush me off. He said, well, you know you have to be a CEO to be in this world. And I said, well I am. I'm 10 over a year. I am.
Kathy Gardarian (:I think you'd be perfect for the Academy. I'll have the president of the Academy call you. So a couple days later, the president called me and we were talking and he was starting to kind of brush me off. He said, well, you know, you have to be a CEO to be in this group. I said, well, I am. I didn't tell him only a year, but I said, I am. Then he said, well, you know, you have to do a minimum of $2 million a year in business.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:And then he said, well, you know, you have to do a minimum of $2 million in your own business. I said, wow. I said, I'm way past that. And he said, I'm really, really proud of you.
Kathy Gardarian (:I said, well, I said, I'm way past that. And so he was quiet. Then he was really quiet for a while. I'm going, now what? And then he said, well, you know, you'd be the only woman. I said, well, you know, I'm used to that. And I think I can bring value to this group and get value. So the way he decided to handle it was he wanted to meet me in person. So I flew to San Francisco and.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:And I said, you know, I'm used to that and I think I can bring value to this meeting and get value. So the way he decided to handle it was he wanted to meet me in person. So I drove to San Francisco and in not even 30 minutes later he said, wow, you're definitely in the right place. So.
Kathy Gardarian (:And not even 30 minutes later, he said, wow, you're definitely qualified to come in. So I joined the Academy as the first woman, first woman on their board. It just was one of the things that I want to say to go to their meetings and to sit with these CEOs of large companies, mostly some entrepreneurs, but
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:first woman on their board. It just was one of the things that...
I want to say to go to their meetings and to sit with these CEOs of large companies, mostly, some entrepreneurs, to have their advice for all the things I was going through was just absolutely the best thing I could have asked for. And I do want to say that I wasn't a member more than two months when I got it.
Kathy Gardarian (:to have their advice for all the things I was going through was just, I mean, it was absolutely the best. You couldn't have asked for more. And I do want to say that I wasn't a member more than two months. And I got a call from the president and he said to me, you know, the Dalai Lama is in Newport Beach for a week. And he says, how would you like to go?
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:How would you like to go? He says that we're gonna let six members of the World Business Academy run. He has said private time is only 40 minutes. You get to ask any questions that you want. He's gonna say each one of you.
Kathy Gardarian (:He says they were going to let six members of the World Business Academy in and it's at a private home with only 40 people and you get to ask any questions that you want. He's going to sit with each one of you alone. I thought, wow, what an opportunity. I said, no, I'll be there. So the backstory to all this is one of my clients that I got and gave to the five guys for four years was the Home Depot stores.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So the back story to all this is one of my clients that I got and gave to the five guys for four years was some of the post -its. I got them in the May of 2012, so that was in May of 2013. And by the time I got them, I was in the May of 2013.
Kathy Gardarian (:I got them when they only had 25 stores in the whole country. And by the time I left these five guys, there were 400 stores. But they already told me, your edict has no back orders and we're opening 246 stores a year. So you've got to keep the existing stores and product and the new stores. So I was so busy.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:for hundreds of years. They already told me, your edict has no back orders and...
We're opening 246 stores in the US. We've got to keep the existing stores and products in the new stores. So I was so busy. And one of the things they then asked me to do was to go to China. And before I met the daughter, I was in China. I found this fabulous factory with mostly women making these merchandise bags. I was so happy.
Kathy Gardarian (:And one of the things they had asked me to do was to go to China. And I before I met the Dalai Lama, I was in China. I was I found this fabulous factory with mostly women making these merchandise bags. I was so happy to give them the business. And we were shipping to the Port of Charleston and the Port of Los Angeles. I had like seven containers on the water. The.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Mm.
Kathy Gardarian (:and the product was great. I was very excited. And then Tiananmen Square happened in 1989, where the Chinese killed about 3 ,000 students and then denied it all. And I was so upset. And I had a lot of people call me that said, you need to take a stand for human rights and you need to leave China. And of course I agreed with them and I was so confused because,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I was so upset and I had a lot of people call me and say, you need to take a stand for your privacy. You need to be a target. And of course, I agreed with them and I was so confused because again, I have this giant account that I was trying to work with and I needed this product to help us fill in for our domestic manufacturers.
Kathy Gardarian (:Again, I had this giant account that I was trying to work with and I needed this product to help us fill in for our domestic manufacturers. Frankly, I just didn't know how to do it. I thought I should. I just didn't know how. So bottom line, I want to share what the Dalai Lama said to me because I would love for everyone to know what he said because it changed my life really. As we're sitting together,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:to know how to do it, I thought I'd show you. I just did it like that. So bottom line, I want to share with you the volume on this afternoon because...
Sure.
Kathy Gardarian (:We're on this couch and we're talking and he is so funny and he's just delightful. He really has a great sense of humor. So when we were talking for a while, then I explained to him what was going on. This was my question for him. And so what he did was he stood up. So of course, when he stood up, I stood up and he took my hands in his hands and he said, Kathy, why would you punish?
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:to strut up. So of course, you strut up, I strut up. And you took my hands and you said, okay.
Kathy Gardarian (:the Chinese people further for the thoughts of a few. He said, that's not how you create your reality. He said, you never think about what you don't want. You only put your thoughts into what you want to see, into the pool of consciousness you want to see, act like it's already happened, and you just keep moving forward. You know, if we think about that advice, Keith, that's...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I'm going to use the people further to get back to the field. He said it's not how you come to an end. He said you look at the effort and think about what you're doing.
to what you want to see, to the full consciousness you want to see. Act like it's already happened and you just keep doing that. You know, if you think about that advice, that's not...
Kathy Gardarian (:That is not only what goes along with everything else I say about leading with love. It's really taking it to even a larger context than that. And that changed the way I viewed everything from that point on. Because a lot of times we don't think about what we want. We're so consumed with everything else. So what a great lesson and the academy just.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:along with everything else I say about human life. It's really taking, it's really taking a huge part in our journey.
I love that story. I'm curious because we when something like that happens in another country our first reaction is we have to pull out because we have to take a stand and you're right.
Kathy Gardarian (:got better and better for me, I just kept learning.
Kathy Gardarian (:Yeah.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:We sometimes are, we don't think about the bigger picture and we overreact, I think, to the global impact of us saying we're doing it.
Kathy Gardarian (:Yes, and I think it's because it was students and then they, and at the time I was there like a month later and I could see that they, you know, I would fly into Hong Kong and then my manufacturer gave us this gift of going over.
to mainland China and when I went to mainland China, you know when I'm in Hong Kong I'm seeing pictures of this terrible thing you go there and they're completely silent about it. They acted like it never happened and I kept trying to talk to people that were our guides to certain things. I said, you know, they would whisper they go we really can't talk about it. We have to act like it never happened. I said, but what about the mothers whose children don't come home?
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:there and they're completely silent about it. They acted like they'd never happen. And I kept trying to talk to people that were on guides to certain things. I said, you know, they would whisper, they go, we really can't talk about it.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I never understood how they had to know. And as a mother, I thought, this was really personally very hard for me. And until the Dolly Mara made me stretch and go in a different way, you know, you're right, we seem to go right to that way. Fortunately, because of the company, I didn't get to meet him again.
Kathy Gardarian (:It's like, I never understood how they handled that. And as a mother, I thought, this was really personally very hard for me. And until the Dalai Lama made me stretch and learn and hold it a different way, you know, because you're right, we seem to go right to that way of holding it. I do want to say that, fortunately, because of the Academy, I did get to meet him again two other times.
And he remembered me and my story and I kept thinking. I said, thank you for really shifting how I held life. It was great.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I love that. Let's get into your book because I'm curious now because you've kind of led us into the love part of it. Name your book is The Wisdom of Love and Business. What led you to write that book?
Kathy Gardarian (:So, goodbye.
Kathy Gardarian (:Well, what, again, I had the Home Depot account for seven years at this time. I ended up having them for 30 years, but this was seven years. And my buyer left that I had done all these programs with. The great CEOs that started it, they were fabulous. And they asked me to please store, door, deliver nationwide. That shifted.
my kind of work too. I needed more employees and think about wherever a Home Depot stories you're going to deliver there all over the country. I mean, it was a huge shift. So I got this buyer that took over from mine and he was so difficult. So difficult. He was a person that would get this close to your face and scream and yell and threaten the business and
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I am the office buyer that took over from mine, and he was so difficult. He was a person that would get this close to her face and scream, but now a debtor in business and someone who would ask you about some program and how it's working, and you start to tell him a piece is really not.
Kathy Gardarian (:someone who would ask you about some program and how it's working and you start to tell him he thinks he's heard enough and then he moves on to something else and yet he didn't really get it and it was so difficult. I remember coming back to my company, this was at the store support center in Atlanta, Georgia where their headquarters is and of course I'm in Newport Beach, California. I came home and I thought honestly I'm gonna give up this account and
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I was on something else in the end and didn't get it. And it was so difficult. I remember coming back to my companies. This was at the store support center in Atlanta, Georgia, where they had the whole system.
I'm in Newport Beach, California. I came home and I thought honestly, I'm going to get the book this and that. And everyone said, what do you mean? They're all pretty. Two or four years in stores a year and you are so involved. You are their main supplier for their dispense products. I'm so happy to see you. I said, I just, I don't think I should.
Kathy Gardarian (:Everyone said, what do you mean? They're opening 246 stores a year and you are so involved. You are their main supplier for their expense products for the store. And how could you leave? I said, I just can't work. I don't think I should even have to work with someone like this. I almost forgot everything I know. So I flew and every time I go up to the academy meeting, I would complain about this guy every month. So finally,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I almost forgot everything I know. So I knew, and every time I go to an academy meeting, I would complain about this guy every night. So finally, there was an intervention from the World Business Academy, and I put it back, because they finally said, no more stories about you. Close your eyes. So I said, no, no, no, no.
Kathy Gardarian (:There was an intervention from the World Business Academy with me, I'll put it that way, because they finally said, no more stories about him. Close your eyes. So I'm sitting there and I said, they said, do you think this man is another aspect of the divine? It's exactly what they said. And I was closing my eyes and all I could picture was him screaming at me really close, you know? And so I opened my eyes and I'm looking at all my...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:They said, do you think this man is another aspect of the divine? And I was closing my eyes and all I could picture was him screaming at me. And so I looked at my eyes, I'm looking at my mouth, we were really all kind of friends. And I said, well, I might be one with all of you, I'm not one with all of you.
Kathy Gardarian (:who are really authentic friends. And I said, well, I might be one with all of you. I'm not one with him. They said, then they all laughed at me. And they said, Cathy, you've forgotten everything you know. Close your eyes again. They said, do you think he's coming from love or from fear? Well, that's when I started to know that I had to remember, but I opened my eyes and of course I had to still make him wrong. I said, well, he's not very loving. And so...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:They said, then they all laughed at me. And they said, Catherine, you've forgotten everything you know. Close your eyes again. They said, you think he's coming from love or from fear? Well, that's when I started to know. And I had no idea at that time. And I opened my eyes, and of course, I had still made him wrong. I said, well, he's not very lovely. And so they said, well, then you think fear is the truth. And I know that's not true.
Kathy Gardarian (:They said to me, well, then do you think fear is the truth of him? And I know that's not the truth of anybody. We're all God's children and we're all born in love. And so I thought, they said, this is what we want you to do. And you should do this with anyone that's really difficult, you know, and is harder to work with. Because all you do when he complains, you're bartering up against him and nothing really gets, it's not productive.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So I said, they said, this is what we want you to do. And you should do this with anyone that's really difficult, you know, and is harder to work with. Because all you do when he complains you are doing up against him, and nothing really gets self -productive, and it's certainly not satisfactory, because it's difficult to work. So they said, we want you to beam him right.
Kathy Gardarian (:and it's certainly not satisfactory. It's a difficult way to work. So they said, we want you to beam him love. I don't care if it's on the phone, I don't care if it's in person, but you just, you don't have to say anything, but let your higher self do business with his higher self and just love him for the way he is and the way he's not. So I remember flying home that day from the...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I don't care if it's on the phone, I don't care if it's in person, but you just, you don't have to say anything. But let your higher self do business with this higher self and just love him, for the way he is and the way he's not. So I remember falling home that day from the meeting with the meeting with the Lord. This is not going to be the meeting with the Lord. I'm going to clean that up and I'm just really looking at my belief system, which I think is very important. So.
Kathy Gardarian (:from the meeting thinking, huh, this is not gonna be easy. I don't know if I'm supposed to beam him love. And I was really looking at my belief system, which I think is very important. And it's like synchronicity right after I got home, he called because there was all these price increases on Polly. And so he said, we're the depot and we're not paying for this, get in my office. He was really upset. So.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:And it's like synchronicity, right after I got home, he called because there was all this pricing crisis on the callee. And so he said, we're the depot and we're not paying for this again in my office. So I ended up flying to Atlanta. And I'm sitting in the waiting room thinking about being me and love. Anyway, bottom line is I did do that.
Kathy Gardarian (:I ended up flying to Atlanta shortly after that. And I'm sitting in the waiting room thinking about beaming him love, you know? Anyway, bottom line is I did do that. And I did it for a year and a half. And a year and a half, and I never said anything. I just created a space for me just to accept him and love him for the way it was. And...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I did it for a year and a half. And a year and a half, and I never said it, I just created this space. For me, just to accept it for the way it was. And he called one Friday night, laid for him, and about four o 'clock the rest of you, and we had a plan with one of our manufacturers on Monday.
Kathy Gardarian (:He called one Friday night late for him and about four o 'clock for us here. And we I had an appointment with one of our manufacturers on Monday who just wasn't getting the product out on time. And he would tell us the truck left and they hadn't made it yet. And I had too many stores for that kind of production. But we liked him and we didn't want him to go away. But so he called. And this is what he said.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I just wasn't getting the product out on time.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:for that kind of introduction. But we liked him and we didn't want him to go away. So we called, but this is what he said, now I want you to see if you can get this straightened out. Then he was quiet, and sometimes when he was quiet on the phone, then he'd start wailing about the phone. So when he was quiet, I never knew what to expect. But this time, he said...
Kathy Gardarian (:Now I want you to see if we can get this straightened out. And then he was quiet and sometimes when he was quiet on the phone, then he'd start yelling about something. So when he's quiet, I never knew what to expect. But this time he said,
You know, Kathy, how you come in a room sometimes and things just seem to calm down. He said, do that. And my son was right near me because he worked with me and he heard it. And I looked at him and he knew that he finally was really feeling what I've been doing, you know. And I have to say from that point on, not only did he give us just millions of dollars more worth of business because he
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:You know, Kathy, how you come in a room sometimes, and things just seem to come back.
And I said, do that. And my son was right near me, because he worked with me, and he heard it. And I looked at him, and he knew that he finally was really feeling what I've been doing. And I have to say, at that point on, not only did he give us just millions of dollars more worth of business, because he loved us as vendors, and was always wanting to be around us, and was always saying, look at these files.
Kathy Gardarian (:loved us as vendors and was always wanting to be around us and was always saying, look at these guys, they're like family, they're not like vendors. I mean, it paid off in spades. And I would have to say that I learned a lot. And from that point on, that's the way I did business. So your earlier question about why do you think it's sort of still going on today? I think we all need to have maybe our own personal experiences.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I think we all need to have maybe our own personal experiences to see the shift in things. But that's a long answer to your question, why did I write the book? I wrote the book because I wanted to be able to do something that I wanted to do.
Kathy Gardarian (:to see the shift in things. But that's a long answer to your question is why did I write the book? I wrote the book because, you know, we did between 30 and 40 million dollars a year in business. You don't get that and you don't keep an account for over 30 years if you're not doing something right. And I definitely wrote it so, and I kind of was leaning towards women.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:because we did between 30 and 40 million dollars a year in business. You don't get that and you don't keep an account for over 30 years if you're not using it. And I definitely wrote it so...
I was leaning towards women because I wanted women never to believe that I was whole. Because you've got to remember when I was told all that, I wasn't even thinking about that. But I've not only empowered myself, I've empowered others, and I've empowered business in a way. And thanks to all the wonderful people around me, including the government, who changed my view. And also, I tell people...
Kathy Gardarian (:because I wanted women never to believe what I was told. Because you got to remember when I was told all that, I wasn't even thinking about my own company. But I've not only empowered myself, I've empowered others and I've empowered business and the way. And thanks to all the wonderful people around me, including the Dalai Lama, it changed my view. And also I tell people,
you know, not only is business relationship, but success is an inside job. So we have to look at what is our belief systems. And I really did that in spades. I looked at the biology of my belief systems and where in my life did I have to forgive myself? Did I have to forgive someone else? And let all those things go and let your own genius and creativity come out. And that's the other reason.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:You know, not only is this a relationship, but success is in the inside job. So we have to look at what is our belief systems. And I really did that in spades. I looked at the biology of my belief systems and where in my life did I have to forgive myself? Did I have to forgive someone else? And let all those things go and let your own genius and creativity go. And that's the other reason. I hope that's helpful.
Kathy Gardarian (:My book has a lot of tools for transformation in it because it's all the things I learned.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I love that word transformation because that's a key for so much that we do in life is transformation. How do you teach that to people? Because it's hard to just kind of wrap your mind around. We can define it in our minds, but how do you teach that to people?
Kathy Gardarian (:Well, I think the way that, and I had a co -writer who the Academy used and she's just wonderful. She straight A's at Harvard. She's in the Writers Guild of America and she writes scripts for Hollywood. So she really good. And when I told her this is a business book, but I really wanted to show, you know, more of a higher consciousness that we could hold and do this with.
And she said, I've always wanted to write a book with about women in business. So we did this together in the way we did it was I share my story about how it all started. And then. For each chapter, I have a quote, an old, a good, an old wisdom quote, I call it, you know, that this quote that I give you a story in my life that almost matches the quote and then.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So we did this together, and the way you did it was I share my story about how it all started, and then for each chapter I have a quote, an old wisdom quote I call it, you know? This quote, then I give you a story in my life that almost matches the quote. And then...
Kathy Gardarian (:At the end of the chapter, I have what I call a Dear Reader page. And then I say, Dear Reader, where in your life is this going on? Have you looked at this? This was my way of teaching, not only telling what happened to me, but having them look a little deeper. Then we go on to the next chapter and there's more quotes. And by the end of the whole book,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:At the end of the chapter, I have what I call a Dear Reader page. And then I say, Dear Reader, where in your life is this going on? Have you looked at this? This was my way of teaching, not only telling what happened to you, but having a little bit of a deeper. Then we go on to the next chapter, and use more quotes. And by the end of the whole book, we did this Tools for Transformation, there's a couple pages, and we took every chapter in like the page, the lesson,
Kathy Gardarian (:we did this tools for transformation. There's a couple pages and we took every chapter in like the major lesson for each chapter. And we put and even I go to my book, to my tools for transformation when I think I need it. So that would be my way of teaching what I learned because honestly, the things that have happened to me since.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:for each chapter. And even I go to my book, so my children are grandchildren, the one I think I'm interested in. So that would be my way of teaching what I learned because honestly, the things that have happened to me since...
Kathy Gardarian (:I mean, even to get the National Association of Women Business Owners gave me a lifetime achievement award. And that says a lot for women nationwide. And also, you know, in Orange County, California, I was in the top 40 women -owned businesses. This is a great way to teach because these are great things that happened that I wasn't even expecting. It was just doing the inner work. And that was my way of...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I mean, even to get the National Association of Women Business Owners, it's taking a lifetime to achieve that. And that's just a lot for women nationwide. And also, you know, in Orange County, California, I was in the top 40 women on businesses. This is a great way to teach because these are great things that happened that I wasn't even expecting. It's just doing the inner work. And that was my way of sharing.
Kathy Gardarian (:sharing the, you know, my friend Jean Houston always says, people learn from storytelling, tell your story. So I finally wrote the book. Yeah.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:My friend Gene Houston always says, people learn from storytelling, tell your story, which I finally learned from that. I love that. Entrepreneurs are a unique group of people. So what are some, if you're talking to a young entrepreneur right now who's just starting out, what advice do you have for them?
Kathy Gardarian (:Yes.
Kathy Gardarian (:I still say do the inner work because we've all had trauma in our life and sometimes we don't know that the trauma is still gets in the way of everything we think we want to do but it stops us. It did for me too. I have a lot of fear. My fear was so strong it was like this pillar, a steel pillar next to me and everywhere I'd move it'd go with me and finally I just talked to it.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:It gets in the way of everything you think you want to do, but it stops us. It did for me.
Kathy Gardarian (:I said, I know you're there, but come on along, we're gonna do this anyway. I mean, you have to realize what the way you're thinking. And I like that word, the biology of belief, because it does make a difference on how we live. So that's the one thing I would say, because I too, and that's what I talk about in the book, is I had a lot of fear. And when you move through, when you can just forgive and move on, I have to tell you, it seemed like,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:you
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:And when you need to, when you can, just forgive and move on.
What do you hope readers take away from reading your book?
Kathy Gardarian (:Synchronistically, things started to drop in my lap because I was open to them. So that would be my greatest advice for any entrepreneur. Yeah.
Kathy Gardarian (:Well, I hope that they see the success that comes from being loving and putting the human spirit into business. It's just, I don't think it's there enough. And when I look at this difficult buyer that I had, by my loving him, it not only made me a better person, it made my company grow, but he recently,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:made me a better person.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:He recently.
Kathy Gardarian (:retired and had his 70th birthday party in Las Vegas and invited me and my son. And he couldn't thank us enough. He said, you are like family. He said, you were so delightful to do business with. And you know, the other thing is you've just got to do what you say you're going to do. That's a big thing. A lot of people don't do what they say they're going to do. So.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I had my 70th birthday party in Las Vegas and invited me and my son to a party.
He couldn't thank us enough. He said, you are like family. He said, you are so delightful to do business with. And you didn't. And you know, the other thing is you've just got to do what you say you're going to do. That's a big thing. How do people not do what they say they're going to do? So the model that's in the book, I mean, all the takeaways that I've learned are in the book. Because.
Kathy Gardarian (:That's the model that's in the book. I mean, all the takeaways that I learned are in the book, because if you don't share your story, I mean, this is how people learn. And and I definitely, like I say, think it's. There's just people that don't know how to let go of the things that are stopping them. And my book shows how I I I did everything. And, you know, in.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:If you don't share your story, this is how people know.
I say.
That's awesome.
Kathy Gardarian (:The first line in my book, it says, I was born with one eye on the door and one eye looking inward. I think I was just born to actually out process this, go through this and probably teach that. I think so.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So how's your book being received?
Kathy Gardarian (:Very well. Now that it was called, first I published it as Feet to the Fire, Fighting My Soul and Success. And Jack Hanfield, who's been a friend of mine for a long time, he didn't like the cover and he said, we don't want to talk about your success. We want to show people that if they read this book, there's some transformational tools so they can be successful. So we changed the name of the book to,
the wisdom of love and business, transformational tools for entrepreneurial to achieve entrepreneurial success. So ever since that, it's really been much better. And a lot of people are talking about it now. And I've also talked to, I really enjoy talking to the universities and the young people, because if you start younger, especially at that formative age, I think it's very helpful.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:about it now. And I've also talked to, I really enjoy talking to the universities and the young people because if you start younger, especially at that formative age, I think it's very helpful. I mean, I didn't start my company when I was like 40.
Kathy Gardarian (:I mean, I didn't start my company until I was like 40. I mean, so it's, yeah. So that's how it's been. It's better now because I think that the title is, I think, more acceptable and Jack loves it. And I really have had so much work working with, you know, Dr. Deepak Chopra endorsed my book and so did Jean Houston and Joan Borosenko and...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So that's how it's been. It's better now because I think the title is, I think, more acceptable. And Jack loves it. And I really have had so much work working with Dr. Deepak Chopra, who co -wrote my book, and so did Eugene Houston and Joan Borosenko, and some of the people that have been in all of this wonderful new thinking about raising your consciousness.
Kathy Gardarian (:some of the people that have been in all this wonderful new thinking about raising your consciousness and being more loving, for sure.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:That's great. I'm always curious, Cathy, you seem really excited and really energetic. What are you excited about in this season of your life?
Kathy Gardarian (:Well, you know, I am a lifelong learner and I love travel. And I've done a little bit of it, but ever since we've redone the book, I have really been busy with the book, but I have my eye on more travel because I think there has to be balance in life. And so sometimes we get into some periods where it seems like it's so focused that we're not looking at anything else, but.
No, I love to learn and I think by travel you learn and you talk to other people and you find out what their thinking is and you learn. So, yeah, that's what excites me the most now.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:That's awesome. I love to travel too. Don't have much time to do much of it, but I'm going to have to do more of it in my life.
Kathy Gardarian (:Yeah.
Yes, I support that. Yep.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I'm always loved to ask my guests this question. What do you want your legacy to be?
Kathy Gardarian (:Can?
Kathy Gardarian (:Hmm.
But.
I just think it's learning to live with kindness and compassion and mindfulness. And now that's what I do and I'm kind to everyone. And I am certainly in doing business, you know, there's, I like to tell people, you know, you really have to walk gently around people because you don't, some wounds are not visible.
And so it was a very hard lesson for me. I struggled until I did have some help, again, the intervention. And I think that...
That's really what I hope to continue to teach and to where people will remember that.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:That's awesome, I love that. As we wrap up our conversation, what key takeaways do you want the listeners to gather from our discussion today?
Kathy Gardarian (:You know how I think, we think we know our future. And when I was working for the Spy Men and I was just working away and doing well, I didn't even think about the larger picture for me. And I think sometimes we, I just want people to not stay in their limitations, but to think bigger. And that's what the book really shows.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:That's amazing.
Kathy Gardarian (:and we all are available and to be more open and loving. It's all there, it's all on the inside. We are divine and we do have it within us. We just have to decide that that's what we want for our life.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So where can people find your book, The Wisdom of Love and Business, and connect with you on social media?
Kathy Gardarian (:Okay, well my book is for sale on Amazon. There's also an audible book as well as a book. And then I have a website, the wisdom of love and business .com. There's some other things on there. And I'm on Facebook and I'm on LinkedIn under Kathy Gardarian. And it's Kathy at kathygardarian .com.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Well, Kathy, thank you so much for what you do and for sharing this, because it reminded me to take a look at ourselves. And I love that idea of leading with love, because we have so much disharmony in our culture today. And instead of returning with love, we kind of return either with fear or anger. But to pour into people with love, it just kind of leads in the way that you said God created us to be and to walk into a room and leave it with love. Somebody said,
Kathy Gardarian (:so much.
Kathy Gardarian (:Absolutely.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Sparkle Jesus as you walk into him. I just kind of love that idea. Yeah.
Kathy Gardarian (:Right. That's right. That's great. Yeah. Well, what a joy it's been to be with you, Keith. Thank you. I love sharing my story with you.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Well, thank you, Kathy, and blessings on your book. May you sell billions of copies, because I think it has a huge impact for the way the business world can be that place where people can find themselves and impact and change the world.
Kathy Gardarian (:Yeah, it works. Yeah.
Thanks so much. I appreciate it.
