Embracing Diversity and Civil Discourse with Philip Blackett: Insights from ‘Disagree Without Disrespect
In this enlightening episode, Philip Blackett shares his inspiring journey and the motivation behind his book, ‘Disagree Without Disrespect.’ Philip emphasizes the importance of embracing diversity of thought and engaging in civil discourse. He highlights the need to see others as human beings and respect their opinions, even when they differ from our own.
Philip delves into the role of faith in promoting understanding and love for one another, encouraging listeners to value and appreciate the unique perspectives of others. He discusses the importance of respect and active listening in productive discourse, stressing the need to separate the issue or belief from the believer’s identity. This approach allows for respectful debate based on facts and logic.
Throughout the conversation, Philip underscores the significance of maintaining open doors for further dialogue, even during disagreements. He shares his excitement about being a good steward of his family and leaving a legacy of faith, education, and love.
Key Takeaways:
- Value relationships and embrace diversity of thought.
- Apply what is learned in everyday interactions.
- Maintain respect and active listening in all discussions.
- Keep doors open for further dialogue, even in disagreements.
Transcript
Well, it's so good to have Philip on. How you doing today, Philip?
Philip Blackett (:Good, Keith, how about you?
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I'm great. It's an awesome day in the Lord, so can't complain.
Philip Blackett (:Every day that we're alive, that's a good day for my book.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:That's right, exactly. I love to ask my guests this question. So what's the best piece of advice you've ever received?
Philip Blackett (:God will provide.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I like that one. I've heard it.
Philip Blackett (:Very. Yeah, I'm glad you have. The backstory about that, Keith, real quick is that, you know, that was something that my wife gave me as parting words when I went to work, especially during a tough time in my life. So we would pray together and I ask her for a reminder and she says, God will provide. I mean, she'll preface that by saying you have the best wife in the world, but.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Yeah.
Philip Blackett (:She'll then come out with the solid advice of saying, God will provide us. That's what I was looking for. Thank you. Thank you for that reminder. That advice is helpful.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Yeah. It is helpful because I think, you know, especially during those tough times, we start to rely so much on ourselves and look for answers in ourselves. And just a reminder that stop working so hard at it. God has your back and we're trusting him, rely on him. And he always surprises you. Sometimes in most amazing ways, if you just stay out of his way and you let him show you.
Philip Blackett (:Absolutely.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:just how awesome and amazing he is.
Philip Blackett (:Amen to that.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Yeah. Love talking to pastor about God things. So one of my favorite things to do. As you think about your life and your career, and I saw your career was very impressive. What God has done in your life. Who were some people along your journey who served to inspire you and become role models for you? Tell us a little bit about them and kind of give them a good chance. Give them a shout out for what they've been, what they meant to you in your life.
Philip Blackett (:Heheheheh
Philip Blackett (:Yeah, of course. So I'll definitely start with a heavenly shout out to my grandparents. So my grandmother and my grandfather and the story behind those two, they were married for many, many years. They are what I would see as a present day example for me of what marriage should be in 2024 and beyond. And they were they were married, they were committed, they raised kids together.
They taught the word of God to them. And they even taught that to the grandparents as far as like, you know, to your children's children, you know, that sort of inheritance that like they abided by that. And in particular, my grandmother was very helpful because, you know, when I was growing up, there was no such thing talked about widely and publicly, especially among the African American community about a kid being on the autism spectrum, right?
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:This was something was like either your kid was special or they use some other word that we can't use now, right? So my grandmother got wind of it and she thought that there's something special about me that God has put inside me and it's part of her job as my grandmother to help, you know, bring it out. And so that belief in myself when many people did not and...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right, exactly.
Philip Blackett (:really cared over the value of education, and then particularly having a strong relationship with Jesus Christ. Those were things that carried on to me even years after her passing. And so now onto my grandfather. My grandfather basically was the best model I had growing up on what a godly man should be. So I'll just pause there and say, my grandfather.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right, yeah.
Philip Blackett (:not my father, right? And so I think from there, you know, he served in the church, he was in the word, he was very opinionated. Some people call it old fashioned now or traditional, but when I think about it now as a married father myself, I take a lot of example from him as far as what a godly man should be, because if it was sufficient back then, as far as what he was basing,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Interesting.
Philip Blackett (:who he was based on the word, then that's good enough for me to keep that legacy going.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right, that's awesome, I love that. Philip, kind of give us your personal story, because I looked at your bio, and the bio doesn't really tell the story, it just kind of tells the accomplishments, but kind of give us the backstory of your journey.
Philip Blackett (:Hey, but isn't that the type of generation we live in now? It's all highlights now. It's the sports center generation. It's the Instagram filters, right? And if you don't like it, you can just delete it and try again, repost it.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So highlights and snapshots, right? Snapshots and soundbites.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Yeah, it's the post, it's the post -risation of our society. That's right. Right.
Philip Blackett (:Yeah, exactly. What's wrong with that? That's real life. So yeah, the real life story for me, you know, born and raised in Memphis, Tennessee, single mother, had a sister, grandparents and my aunt, they helped my mom as far as raising us. Value of education became very clear to me, like in seventh and eighth grade. Up until then, I was just trying to fit in.
It really just took that seriously where it's like the best way I felt I could, you know, really pay it forward and honor my mother and my grandparents and those that had raised me and sacrificed for me was to do the very best I could academically. You know, I couldn't, they wouldn't let me get a job to help support, you know, put me, you know, put food on the table. They're like, your job, Phillip is to excel in the classroom. Okay. And I don't want no poor performance reviews at the end of.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:quarter. Okay. Otherwise we're gonna have some problems. You don't want no problems with me. Okay. and so that's what I did. You know, I, I, I straightened up as early as like seventh grade became validatory in my class, eighth grade went to a prestigious high school after that did well there, graduate top 10%. Got accepted to every college I applied to, including Ivy league, but didn't go to Ivy league. I went to university, North Carolina, Chapel Hill.
Primarily because they paid my whole way as far as a full scholarship. It's kind of tough.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Was it because of basketball?
Philip Blackett (:I think that was icing on the cake, Keith. The campus was beautiful, went to a basketball game when visiting. I was like, this is going to be a tough decision because at the time I had already got accepted by my top choice Harvard College. And so once the scholarship came through, I was like, OK, we got a tough decision here. And my mom's probably not going to be really thrilled to hear about it because she had her heart set on Harvard for me too. But after consoling her,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:wow. OK.
Philip Blackett (:and drying some tears from her face, not mine. I said, listen, I'll make a promise to you. Let me go to North Carolina. You don't have to pay a thing. And I'll do well there. And I'll do my best afterwards to go to Harvard, but for business school. And so that was a promise I made back when I was 18. It took me a little time to actually fulfill that.
It got to around: of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Then shortly after business school, literally the day after graduation, I got married.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:That's a beautiful story. So I had you on because we connected because of the book you wrote and the title of your book is Disagree Without Disrespect, How to Respectfully Debate with Those Who You Think, Believe, and Vote Differently. What led you to write this book?
Philip Blackett (:And so I think now it's just basically, you know, in a place where really figuring out the next chapter that God has for me while I'm raising these two kids with my wife.
Philip Blackett (:Mm -hmm.
Philip Blackett (:So it happened around 4th of July last year. I told you all these good things about my mom. And so let's continue the story here. So my mom came up to visit us in Boston with my sister. And so she got to see her kids and her grandkids. We were going to have a great time. So we were sitting in the living room. My sister was talking about some topic. I don't even remember it now. But there was clearly a difference of opinion.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:You
Philip Blackett (:on that particular topic. And I saw it as a perfect idea or opportunity to engage with her and share and learn more about her. And my mom thought otherwise. She said, nope. Flag on the place you put on her referee umpire shirt, mask on, whatever you want to call it, threw the flag on the place. And we're not going to engage on this because I don't want no fighting to happen. And that's not have.
you know, a good four for July. I don't want fireworks before the actual fireworks tonight, basically. and I, I get it. She was playing peacemaker. I think at the end of it, though, I felt at a loss. And the reason why I felt at a loss, Keith was that, you know, my thought on this was I don't see my sister often. And this was something as far as us having a conversation that I was looking at and not so much trying to win an argument.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:that I was looking at.
Philip Blackett (:or get into some sort of fight verbally, but more so to share my perspective, because I knew that my viewpoint was different from hers and probably different from the majority of my family. And so I think that what came off my mind was just the thought of if this is happening with me and my family, like how many other people around the country, around the world are having those type of awkward situations where if you have a difference of opinion,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Okay.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:This is happening with me and my family.
Philip Blackett (:and it doesn't even have to deal with politics, how can you engage with people you love and you respect and work with in a way where it's okay to disagree and you can do it without being disagreeable or disrespectful? And so that's where it came off to me as like, hey, let me put some pen and paper here, came up with a framework for it. And that's what came out of this book, you know, disagree without disrespect, how to respectfully debate with those who think, believe and vote.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So I looked at your book and I noticed that you had some kind of bullet points of things you want to accomplish through this book. And one of them was helping people understand the critical role of embracing diversity of thought.
Philip Blackett (:differently from you.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:and civil discourse. So how do you help people navigate that aspect in our daily conversation?
Philip Blackett (:Right. So I think one thing that comes off, Keith, is really educating people what diversity of thought is and why is it important in our civil discourse or just to break it down to another level, just in our society, just us, our regular conversations, our interpersonal relationships with people. It's one of those things that when it comes to diversity of thought, it's understanding, hey, like,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:And hey, it's okay to have...
Philip Blackett (:it's okay to have different viewpoints because if you're in business, that's what they call like innovation, right? It's like you didn't do the same thing for 200 years. Otherwise we still be riding around on a horse and carriage right now. Somebody had to have a different thought is like, Hmm, what if we actually had wheels and put, you know, some sort of contraption on top of them and called it in automobile or let alone.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:that's what they call innovation.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:same thing for 200 years.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:We wouldn't be talking right now across the country like this, seeing each other because otherwise we'd be going off of a telegram or messenger service if there wasn't somebody that thought differently and say, Hey, let's try this. Let's, let's see if we can not only have people call in on a telephone, but now we can do it where it's like people can video conference from their computers, from their homes and offices. And they don't even have to be in the same.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right. Exactly.
Philip Blackett (:place, right? So diversity thought is not a new thing. It's just new for this generation. It's just new for where this society is. And so what it's really about is sharing how non -foreign this is and help people understand that we actually can do a lot of good once we reinstitute what the rules engagement are. So a good example of that, Keith, would be
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
It's just new.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:is and help people understand that we actually can do a lot of good once we re -institute what the rules and engagement are. So a good example of that would be.
Philip Blackett (:You know, my mom, she works in the court. I keep talking about my mom, man. I don't know what you said, Keev. You know, shout outs to my mom, man. So.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:You didn't mention her in the people you talked about.
Philip Blackett (:I mean, hey, you get in where you fit in, man. So, I mean, she works in a courtroom. And so she's used to having attorneys come in, plead their case and sort of some people, you know, on one side, very foreign issue and another one very against the issue. And they'll argue passionately, outspokenly, even aggressively. But one of the things I picked up on growing up was when they finish debating,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Get in when you sit up.
Philip Blackett (:when they come out of the courtroom, the decision is made, somebody won, somebody lost. More times than not, I would often see both those same attorneys. They shake hands, they congratulate the person on the case, and oftentimes they'll be seen like eating lunch together, going to like their daughter's soccer game on the weekends, or even spending time with the family during the holiday season. Now, initially for the untrained eye, you're thinking to yourself,
Okay, you're like colluding with the enemy here. You're like yours. That's where sleeping with the enemy, that phrase came from, right? Like the person that's in the midst of this, they got, you know, they got hosed, Keith, they got hosed in the process. But the lesson learned for me was you can have a difference of opinion and you can still work with one another. Or as my mom would say, you know, Philip,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:just because I disagree with you, that does not mean that I don't love you. So this whole principle that love and respect for one another is not contingent on you agreeing with them on everything. If we got a good sense, a good grounding on that principle alone, man, like what kind of world would we live in now? What a wonderful world this would be compared to what we have now.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right. And I think what you're just describing to me as I try to wrap my mind around what's happening in our society is we have dehumanized the other side. And I can't respect your opinion if I don't respect you as a human. And as we would say, as people who work in the church or work as Christians, everybody was created and designed by God. So that means they're special and unique because God created them.
If we don't see the person across the table from us, we disagree with their views as a beautiful masterpiece of God, we can never really understand and listen to what they have to say. I think we have lost that ability to see the other person as human and unique and special. And so we just devalue them and we can discredit everything they have to say because we discredit them as an individual and as a human. And that's the saddest thing about our discourse to me.
is we don't see the other side as human.
Philip Blackett (:Yeah, I agree with you. The thought is, you know, it's almost like just simple logic. Like I know I went to different schools, Keith, but just a simple logic here, just on the ultimate source, the Bible, the ultimate textbook, right? If we were made in God's image, then there should be value that we see in each person because God sees value in that person too. If we don't see value in that person, we are not being like God.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:God is our creator, God is our heavenly father. We should be more like him because we are made in his image. So for us to place judgment on somebody like that and devalue that person, that is not reflective of his image. And if his image is good, then what is the opposite of his image?
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:Right? So it's that sort of thought where it's just like, you know, even to another degree to keep like, listen, God knows everything. God is good. Right? Do you not think that God disagrees with what we say, think and do on a daily basis?
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Mm -hmm.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right, exactly.
Philip Blackett (:Like what would it be like if God canceled us?
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:we have a short little blip in the history books there.
Philip Blackett (:Like like like think about it. God is so powerful, right? He can throw like he like Satan fell down like lightning, right? When it rains, I still see lightning happening. Thunder, right? If God wanted to strike every person that was counter to his goodness. Do you know how few people will be living after like an hour of him doing that? But he doesn't do that.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Mm -hmm.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Yes. Right. Exactly.
Philip Blackett (:He's merciful. He still allows us to live despite us hitting our heads across the brick wall. So it's like, if he's that merciful for us, even Christians who don't always get it right, how much more merciful should we look towards being other people that disagree with us simply because God is that merciful and loving towards us as well.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Exactly. You have another concept I want to kind of touch on in your book, a couple others, but the word respect. I've noticed as I've gotten older that somewhere along the way that word respect became an issue because I served in a lot of rural and urban communities. So like in Detroit, St. Louis, Milwaukee, Chicago, that word respect has kind of shifted and
if you disrespect me, then I can retaliate. So as you think about that word respect, as you talk about in your book, how do you define it and how do we regain that as we talk about this discourse with each other?
Philip Blackett (:So when you say that, Keeva, I instantly think of a lot of people think in respect, whether rural or urban communities, almost from a position of fear, right? Which is odd, now that I say that, because I'm thinking like the fear of God in the Bible, that is more so like a deep reverence and respect for God, right? But in this case, right.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Yeah.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right. Sense of, sense of awe.
Philip Blackett (:We're not talking about that here with regular human beings. We're talking about, I'm disrespecting you if I accidentally scuffed your Air Jordans while walking to the grocery store. And now I got a fear for my life because now you're thinking about pulling up on me because I accidentally scuffed your shoes. I disrespected you. Right. And so I think about when, when the whole concept of respect comes from is like,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:You know.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:This shouldn't be Philip's definition of respect. This is more like, okay, what is the legacy definition of respect? Like, you know, what is that like? And so I'm thinking to myself like, okay, I wouldn't treat everyone like God, because that's a supreme level of fear and reverence that should only be reserved to God, right? Otherwise we have idols, right? So.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right, exactly.
Philip Blackett (:Not too far from there would be the sense of respect, like we just talked about before, like, you know, every person has made an image of God. OK, so if God sees value in them, I see value in them, too. So it's reflecting that value as far as like, you know, being courteous, being nice, being gentle, being respectful in the sense of like, hey, I recognize the value and dignity of who you are.
And whether we disagree on the issue or you accidentally scuff my shoes, like I value you enough to treat you in the proper way. And sometimes that might mean turning the other cheek. Sometimes that might mean giving you water despite you spitting that knee. But it's more citizens like it has to be based on some sort of model or archetype as far as who you try to resemble. And I think it really comes back to me, at least.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:The best example I think of is when Jesus washes other people's feet. Because Jesus, he had inherent value and dignity in himself. He knew he was. He took the lowest form of service to honor people that were still lowlier than him out of love. And so it's one of the things that comes off as like amongst peers,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So it's one of the things that comes off the site amongst peers.
Philip Blackett (:How do we love one another? How do we serve one another? Whether from a high level or a low level, fully knowing who we are as far as what our value is, but also respecting the value of other people and seeing that enough to be of service, to be of companionship, to be good to others, even if they're not returning the favor.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:That's great. So you wrote this book so you can solve all of our problems and make us all get along as a world. How's that going?
Philip Blackett (:Well, listen, the first thing I think of is we got this big book called the Bible that was written many, many, many, many years ago. So my book, Far, is not even like the consideration of MVP, right? MVB, like most valuable book compared to the Bible. And we still got people not adhering or completely discarding what
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Ha ha!
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:the book says. What I would say, at least from my sense, is that what's been helpful for people, for those that read my book, is they're seeing a sense of clarity in terms of what they can apply. Because it's one thing to read something and then put it back on the bookshelf. that's an interesting read. Like, that's not the purpose of this book. That's not the purpose of the Bible. It's not like, this is nice. It's good, good sayings, good lessons.
this good philosophy. You go back to your normal life after you put it on the shelf. No, it's about application. Like what you learn, you want to apply it in real life. And that's the similar vein I took with disagree without disrespect. It's, you know, that five step framework. How do you start applying that in your next conversation? Or you learn in the background as far as why we got to this point and why diversity of thought is needed. And so you're thinking about in terms of, you know, while you're in the workplace and your next.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:and they're sharing ideas. Well, if your idea is valuable, go ahead and put it on the table. You can see, you know, everyone's stocking, et cetera, right? Or just as far as like, you know.
Philip Blackett (:team meeting and they're sharing ideas. Well, your idea is valuable. Go ahead and put it on the table to see, you know, everyone's thought being considered, right? Or just to sense as far as like, you know, how you go about working with people that are not Christians and you're sharing with them something that they hadn't learned about before, weren't exposed before, weren't considering before.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:working with people that are not pressure. And you share with them something that they hadn't learned about before, weren't exposed to before, weren't considering before. It's really just trying to apply what's learned. And so far, from the feedback I've gotten, I think that it's been good as far as application of what's here.
Philip Blackett (:It's really just trying to apply what's learned. And so far from the feedback I've gotten from readers, it's been good. It's been good as far as application of what's been written.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I noticed that one aspect of your book, and I think it's one of the most important aspects, is how do you master the art of active listening? I think the communication and how we listen and interact when we're listening is so key. So talk about a little bit about how you promote that understanding of that aspect of your book in our dialogue and our discourse.
Philip Blackett (:You know, it's one of those things that you don't typically long for better times beforehand. But sometimes I do when you didn't have like the phone, when you didn't have all these distractions that are constantly vying for your attention. Because I think when active listening comes to play, what comes off my head, Keith, is...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:everything around me could be burning up. And then this is even I said that analogy, you probably would say, Keith, you, you, Phillip, you should have enough sense to say if your house is burning, you should have enough sense to say, Hey, Keith, my house is burning. I got to go. I'm listening to you, but I got to go. Let's like, let's reconnect after I get out of the house and figure out what's going on. But so maybe that analogy doesn't quite work out, but more so the thought behind it, the intention was,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right exactly
Philip Blackett (:The conversation I'm having with you, Keith, is the most important thing for me to engage on right now.
And so for me to not focus on what am I going to say next to you after what you said or come up with a quick rebuttal or ha ha like, you know, to what you have to say, it's like more like I'm trying to understand where Keith is coming from. What is his perspective here? What is the background? What is the backstory behind it? Because in some sense, you're sharing something that is not only potentially vulnerable to you, to me.
but it's also something that is personal or like it's almost like a gift because you're sharing with me what you've been thinking, what's on your mind, what's of concern, like you're opening yourself up to me. And so if I'm not respecting that enough to be attentive, to be present, to be engaged with what you're saying, then the message that comes off to you, Keith, in some sense is,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:You don't matter as much. You don't matter as much as wars. What am I going to say next? You don't matter as much compared to what I need to do next. And so in that same vein, like if nothing else, just being able to sit down and listen to people and fully like actively listen, like like hear what's going on and understand it. And if you don't understand it, ask questions, don't just take it on face value like.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:ask clarifying questions. You're probably not going to disrespect that person. They're probably going to be thankful that you actually care enough to learn more. And so I think that, you know, in the midst of all the distractions we have at our fingertips, literally, I think it's one of those things where, you know, that is a great way of showing respect for other people, just being there, being present and actively listening to what you have to say.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I think it's one of those things where that is a great way of showing respect for other people. Just being there, being present.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:That's great. So Phillip, I'm curious as you think about where you are right now in your season of your life, what are you most excited about?
Philip Blackett (:I'm most excited about my girls being of age at seven years old, where they start to remember good memories. Now they can also remember bad memories. And so my focus as a parent is to try to limit those bad memories and expand on the good ones. Right. But it's one where it's like thinking, you know, the joys of parenthood, the joys of fatherhood, the joys of that next stage of marriage.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Yeah.
Philip Blackett (:That's what I'm most excited about because I think, you know, you're right. If you read my bio, there's a lot of accomplishments. It's like a highlight reel, that sort. But I guess the story now as I'm approaching 40 is more the thought of, you know, what's really important to me now. And that's really being a good steward of what God has blessed me with. And that's my family. And really taking that moment to say, hey, look,
these next 10 to 11 years, we have these girls with us. I want them to be full of memories that, you know, when my wife and I are in rocking chairs and that sort later on, not only do we have good memories we can recollect, but the girls as they grow up, they'll have plenty of stories, plenty of memories and a fondness of their childhood and what it was like, you know, being raised with us.
Because I can honestly attest to you, that's not the case for everybody. You know, you still have many people that are reliving childhoods that were not pleasant. Some that have questions for their parents that, you know, is trying to address past hurts. And that might be 20 years later after it has actually been done. The parent has already moved on or even transitioned on. But there's still hurt that needs to be addressed. So I...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
So I take it very seriously about our listeners.
Philip Blackett (:I take it very seriously the thought of, listen, you know, my childhood was the best it could be given the circumstances. And I have an opportunity with each day I've been blessed to live again to add another moment at another day, both for my wife and also my girls of a pleasant, worthwhile, memorable experience of us as a family.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:given the circumstances.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:day, both my wife and also my girls.
That's great. And this is a more personal question. I like to ask my guests this question. We kind of begin to wind down our great conversation. What do you want your legacy to be?
Philip Blackett (:I want my legacy to be a continuation of what my grandparents were.
values of education, faith in God, personal relationship with Jesus Christ, a biblical worldview. Those sorts of things that come up, those sorts of values and principles. Me being somebody that was outspoken for God, that stood on his word, even in the midst of a world that would
gladly do life without them. And so, you know, I can't impact the whole world. That's not my job. Jesus, he can take that on. Jesus take the wheel on that one. But I can influence the world most close to me and that's my family. And so what type of husband was I? What type of father was I? Was I faithful? Was I present? Was I loving? Was I caring? Was I...
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:sure.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:why isn't my instruction given to them, passing that on to them so that they can pass on to their next generation as far as grandkids and they're on. That's what I want to be known for because I think that we live in a world now that is constantly trying to redefine what's right and what's wrong and what does it mean to be X versus Y. And I think at some point men and women, especially of the faith,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:have to stand strong, even if you feel like you're in a minority of one and say, listen, this is what I was taught. This is what I believe was right back then. And just because 20, 30 years have passed on, that doesn't mean that this is any less right now. So just wanted to stand on that and just pass that legacy for the next generation of those that have the fortune to be able to impact and influence going forward.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:That's powerful. As you wrap up our conversation, what are some key takeaways you want our audience and our listeners to remember from our discussion today?
Philip Blackett (:definitely find good people to shout out as far as people that have been influential to you. it just, you know, count your blessings. the name, the one by one each day. And a lot of that deals with the people that God has put in your life. in lessons learned that maybe in the process, in that moment, you might not have thought was good, but God had a higher purpose because his ways are not our ways. that later on you can.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Yeah.
Philip Blackett (:Understand like okay, that's why that happened. That's why this had to this detour had to take place You know, and so just being open to that And then also the part about the importance of diversity of thought, you know, you can disagree with the idea And still love the believer, you know, that's kind of a play on hating the sin and love in the center Because we still see each other with that image of God in each one of us and so
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:We should be as respectful and as loving to those people, whether they agree with us or not, because our Heavenly Father loves us as well.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:What are some key takeaways you want people to get who read your book?
Philip Blackett (:So I think the key takeaways would just be the framework, right? I touched on one of them earlier, but just from step one to step five, first one is separate the issue or belief from the identity of the believer. Part of the reason why it's so tough to have a conversation or debate with people is that people can be so intertwined with one particular issue or belief that it becomes who they are, right? So, so.
to disagree with the issue means you're disagreeing with that person and who that person is. When I criticize that belief or idea, now they've taken a personal saying, I'm criticizing you. Right. You go to the second step and say, Hey, I can disagree with the belief and I can love you as the believer. I can still respect you as a believer. Right. When you set that framework, now we can actually debate on the issue at hand. Let's focus that on, I don't know.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Now we can actually debate on the issue of camp. Let's focus that on, I don't know, the merit?
Philip Blackett (:the merits of the issue at hand. Like, let's talk about facts, data, logic, performance, analysis, review of that performance, rather than these outlandish name calling or overdrawn out emotional responses that, you know, I'm born like pouring my eyes out crying keeps going to be like,
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:data, logic, one.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I'm like pouring my eyes out crying.
Philip Blackett (:I don't know how to respond to that, so I'm just gonna go exit stage.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Exactly.
Philip Blackett (:Right? So if you focus on just the merits of it, even when you finish, whether it's me coming to your side, Keith, or vice versa, maybe we stay on our separate corners or maybe a third alternative came out and we weren't even expecting it. Let's do what we learned in sports. We do at the end of every game.
Shake hands. It's a good game. They still do that nowadays. And so when you're still able to do that, show that good sportsmanship and then still respect and love that person afterwards, the key then is be able to keep the door open for further dialogue. So that could be the sense where it's like, you know what, Keith, I appreciate you sharing what your thoughts are. I still.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:So was.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:you
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I appreciate you sharing with us.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Right.
Philip Blackett (:feel this certain type of way after engagement, but I feel that much more educator that much more aware of what's important to you and why that is. And I appreciate you sharing that with me. And I'd be open to learning more about it over lunch next week. Or maybe we can go to this event and they have this like coffee, you know, meeting greet there and that story afterwards. And we can talk about what we discussed or what we heard about.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:meeting brief there in the story afterwards. We can talk about what we've discussed or what we've heard about. So keeping the conversation open. Because oftentimes what you have is if someone disagrees with someone else, they cancel. They unfriend you. There's no like back and forth dialogue happening because that's been cut off. Let's not be like the world. Let's be ones that can say, hey, my door is open.
Philip Blackett (:So keeping the conversation open, because oftentimes what you have is if someone disagrees with someone else, they cancel you. They unfriend you. There's no like back and forth dialogue happening because that's been cut off. Let's not be like the world. Let's be ones that can say, Hey, my door is open. Let's continue the conversation. And I think when you have that framework in mind, I think you'll start to come off as somebody that has that light.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:I love that. Where can people find your book, Disagree Without Disrespect, How to Respectfully Debate, and With Those Who Think and Believe and Vote Differently?
Philip Blackett (:that this dark world desperately needs.
Philip Blackett (:Absolutely. So it's available on Amazon. So you can go to amazon .com, look up disagree without disrespect. You can also look at my name, Philip Blackett, P H I L I P B L A C K E T T. You'll be able to find the book and my other books there as well.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Where can they connect with you if they want to learn more about you and what you're doing on social media?
Philip Blackett (:So yeah, you can definitely follow me on LinkedIn. I'm on other platforms too, Twitter, Instagram. Just look up my name, Philip Blackett. And also you can go to my website, philipblackett .com, P -H -I -L -I -P -B -L -A -C -K -E -T -T .com.
of Becoming Bridge Builders (:Well, Phillip, thanks so much for taking the time to be a guest on the podcast and blessings on the work you do. May people go out and buy this book, leave a review, because that's how people can find the book and the book gets more play on Amazon. So thank you for this really engaging conversation.
Philip Blackett (:Absolutely, my pleasure, Keith. It was great to have this conversation with you as well.
