Beyond Blind Blaming: Uncovering the Truth Behind Your Struggles

Keith Haney: 00:01:00

Welcome to the show where we dive deep into the minds of game changers, truth tellers and breakthrough market makers. Today's guest is someone who doesn't just challenge the status quo, he dismantles it.

Kevin D. St Clergy is a breakthrough specialist, best selling author of Beyond Blind Blaming, the host of the Beyond Blind Blaming podcast.

Known for his direct disruptive approach, Kevin helped helps entrepreneurs and leaders uncover the real problems behind the problem so they stop solving the wrong thing perfectly. After building an exciting, multiple successful business, Kevin now coaches others using his signature RCD method and blame loop framework.

His work blends behavioral psychology, personal transformation and unapologetic truth telling to spark rapid breakthroughs in mindset, health, relationships and business. His insights have been featured in global stages and his book has earned praise from thought leaders such as Jack Canfield.

Whether he's coaching mastermind groups to delivering keynotes, Kevin brings clarity where there is confusion and breakthrough where there is blame. Kevin, welcome to the podcast.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:02:07

Thanks for having me. It's great to be here. Really appreciate it.

Keith Haney: 00:02:10

Looking forward to this conversation.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:02:12

So it'll be fun.

Keith Haney: 00:02:13

Start out with my favorite question. Kevin, what's the best piece of advice you've ever received?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:02:19

It's actually a quote. How you do anything is how you do everything.

Keith Haney: 00:02:23

Okay.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:02:23

And it just stuck in my head and actually was on John Wick 4 recently. And I was like, oh, they stole my quote. It's actually, it's on a sign in my little kitchenette here in my office that I look at every day.

Was just somebody like that. I was, I was very much into business like a lot of us are, you know, we just go, go, go. But then I ignored, you know, I've been married twice.

Unfortunately, I had to learn the hard way that there are good ways to have a relationship in bad ways. So, you know, I put myself into my work and that's what came first. Instead of myself, instead of my relationships, instead of my family.

So I learned the hard way that how you do anything is how you do everything. And if you're sloppy at home, you're going to be sloppy at work. And you can't be the best version of yourself. That's the best advice I ever got.

How you got it. How you do anything is how you do everything.

Keith Haney: 00:03:10

Wow, that's really, that's really insightful. And sometimes, you know, those mistakes in life, we grow from them. Sometimes in our brokenness, you find strength that you didn't know you had.

You also find a part of yourself you have to work on. So you know Sometimes those tough moments are worthwhile in our journey.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:03:28

I think so too. I think you have to fall, but you also have to decide to get back up.

Keith Haney: 00:03:32

Right? Exactly. So let's start with your story, Kevin. What led you to become a breakthrough specialist? What was the defining moment that shifted your path?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:03:42

Yeah. So we. I'll start with what happened recently.

And in fact, it was three years ago yesterday that we sold, had a very life changing exit and sold my companies. And after I sold my companies, I came home in my dream car. It was really fun. I made one stupid purchase, which is funny. I called the financial guy.

I was like, well, can I go get it? He's like, yeah, I can have you go get your car. And I hung up on him. I wasn't going to give him the chance to talk me out of it.

I had the Lamborghini on my dream board for 21 years and I was going to get it. So. And he calls me back laughing. He's like, I was going to try to talk you out. I was like, nope, not happening. So anyway, I got home to the party.

We had a small group of friends gathering. And one of my friends, I'll never forget, and I owe him everything because we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him, he said, so, Kev, what's next?

And I thought, and I was like, well, gosh, I don't know. This is all I've thought about. I kind of thought I was done. He's like, you're only 50 years old. I know you're not done.

And it really bothered me to the point where we, you know, we don't party late or anything. You just shut it down. And I came into my office and I wrote on my little virtual whiteboard, what is next?

And looked up on my bookshelf, I'm glad you're a reader too, seeing behind you. And I saw a book on how to write a TED Talk. And I was like, well, that sounds fun.

Maybe I can kind of build up my speaking career, do some more talks, get on ted, whatever. So I joined a mastermind group with a woman who was actually on Ted.com.

and I didn't really know what I wanted to talk about because you need one idea worth sharing. And she hooked me up with some writers who made me go through my whole life and all these stories and life lessons that I heard.

And we settled on this story of when I was 10 years old. And it, it's basically when I was 10 years old, I was a phenomenal baseball player.

I had a.550 batting average, which is really good for those of you don't know anything about.

Keith Haney: 00:05:17

Really good, yeah.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:05:18

Babe Ruth, I think in his heyday was.394. So now there's always some smart aleck in the comments on social media.

He's like, well, you were pitching against 10 year old pitchers, which is true, but it's still really freaking good. Okay, so give me a little credit.

So my dad started to work with me, as dads do, and moms as well, pushing their sons, who are really great, to work on their mindset. And then we got a swing coach and we worked really hard in the off season. And it was my life. I loved it.

And then the next year I stood up to bat and something was different and I started striking out and I kept striking out for the entire year. I literally went from.550 to zero, which is really bad. I went from hero to zero. And you can probably guess what I heard from the stands.

Come on, kid, keep your head in the game. Let's play to win this time.

And my dad would give me lectures on the way home, of all the stuff I did wrong for the day and how I needed to adjust my attitude. And by the way, he still remembers this to this day and still blames my attitude.

I was telling him about the book and everything else over Christmas and he's like, yeah, when Kevin was 10 years old, he's the best GD ball player I've ever seen. His attitude went to, you know what, right? I'm like, dad, I just told you what the problem was. He goes, oh, yeah, write that.

It's like, it doesn't compute, which we'll get to in a minute. So I played another year, another zero betting average, and I had had enough. It was the first time in my life where I felt like a complete failure.

And it was devastating because that was my dream. In fact, I quit the next year. And two weeks after I quit, at a flu eye exam, a fluke eye exam, we figured out what the real problem was.

I couldn't see. The doctor said, hey, sorry, kids. Practically blind without glasses. And the real problem was this.

The adults in my life never stopped blaming me for something that ended up being out of my control. And I see this every day in business and people's lives.

And it's one of the major issues I have with self help books right now is because they're constantly pointing the finger and sometimes there are things going on that you can't see, that you have absolutely no Control over. And what we've designed is a framework to help people get to the bottom of it. So that's my short story long.

Keith Haney: 00:07:08

Wow, that's insightful.

I wonder how many people would never have picked up on getting to the reason not being youth attitude was the reason, because baseball is such a difficult sport as it is. I mean, it's the only sport where if you. If you fail 7 out of 10 times your success.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:07:28

So no doubt, no question about it, but when you're a zero, you really are zero.

Keith Haney: 00:07:32

You really are zero. Yeah, you're not getting to sign a giant with the Giants at that. That. That's right. So let's get into a little bit more about your.

I love how you describe yourself as direct and disruptive. I always say I'm one of those people who. I'm not just a catalyst in an organization. I like to kind of blow the box up and start over again.

So I'm kind of curious, how do you. How do you. How do you clients respond to that style and why is it so effective?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:07:59

Well, it's a great question. It was actually a client of mine who said, man, you're a breakthrough specialist. And I'm like, oh, I like that. And I was like.

And she's worked with coaches and consultants before. And I'll just share with you what she told me, because it's a lot better when it comes from someone else.

She's like, you know, Kevin, all my other coaches and consultants gave me tips and tricks. You gave me the truth, and that's what set me free. And I was like, wow, I really like that. That's really great. Can I steal that?

So that's truthfully how it came about.

And some of the concepts in the book and everything just came from my 30 years of coaching and working with business owners and entrepreneurs and helping them be better, which turned into being more life coaches, too, because good goes back to how I really, truly feel on the inside. How you do anything is how you do everything. And sometimes I think a coach's job.

I think a coach can help people see who they can be, not who they are now. But a coach's job is not to be your friend. It's kind of like a parent. A parent's job is not to be your friend.

I think that's the mistake a lot of divorced parents make. My parents made that mistake where they tried to be our friends, and I really affected our development, our ability to need structure and.

And things like that. Not that I'm parent of the year. By any means. But I think a good coach is going to tell you the truth even when you're not ready to hear it.

Keith Haney: 00:09:14

I love that. So let's get into your book, Beyond Blind Blaming. So first of all, I love when you write a book, you have to come up with the title. Why that title?

So tell us the story behind the title and let's get in then get into the book.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:09:26

Yeah, it was when I was working with those writers that I told you about in that mastermind group. She hooked me up with some writers who took me that took. Took me about three weeks to go through my whole 50 years on the planet back then.

And it was really fun because when we, but we. They really like the story of the 10 year old story that I just told me when I was 10.

And I'm the one that came up with the term because they were like, you know, we always like to come up with a term that will stick in people's head. I'm like, what about blind blaming? And they're like, oh, we love that. We love that.

So I actually went and looked and I was like, and this is how I started my first company, believe it or not, it was called Educated Patients. At the time. Time I was like, well, if educatedpatients.com is available, I'll do it.

And I did the same thing this time I was like, well, if blind blaming.com is available, maybe it's a sign. And sure enough, shockingly, it was available. Then I started googling it and nobody's really termed the used that term before.

And so we trademarked that.

And then my old business partner that we used that, we grew that, that marketing agency that I sold a few years ago, I went to him, I was sharing with the idea with him. He's like, you know, Kev, I like it. But he goes, you know, why don't you try to put a little bit more positive spin on it.

What about beyond blind blaming? And that's how he came up with the title of the book.

So it was me with my network of friends and family and then mentors and coaches that I had personally hired that helped me get there. Which is kind of a point of beyond Blind blaming to move beyond it, which we'll get to.

Sometimes you got to get out of your own way, but you, it's like looking in the mirror versus having somebody look at you through a window. If you're looking at yourself in the mirror, you only see one thing and you're going to see your flaws and everything else.

When Somebody looks through a mirror at you, they can see some things that you can't necessarily see, especially when it comes to solving problems.

Keith Haney: 00:11:04

So let's get into beyond blind blaming. What is it as you try to define that for those who are listening and kind of walk readers through the core message of your book?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:11:13

Sure. So blind blaming is blind because you can't see what's really going on, just like I did in my baseball story.

Or sometimes I see this in business where people blame the marketing agency that they hired, and it's a scar because I used to own one, and it's actually their front desk who's not answering half the calls. And the half of the calls they do answer, they're not following a particular best practice script that will convert that call into an appointment.

Or other times I've seen people blame other people for leadership issues where they say, people just don't want to work anymore. Kevin, what do I do? I was like, well, maybe they just don't want to work for you.

And, you know, I'll ask them questions like, well, do you have a hiring process in place? And they'll say, what do you mean? I'm like, okay, wrong answer.

Do you have an onboarding sequence that you try to develop them into a leader within your company? Well, no, I don't know what that is. Okay, well, we've got some work to do. So I think you get my point.

Blind blaming is blind because you can't see the real problem. And as I said in our tagline, it's not that people are failing at solving their problems. They're succeeding at solving the wrong problem perfectly.

And then it's blaming because we instinctively have to blame something or someone, even sometimes ourselves. It's just the way that our brain deals with problems like that, which we'll get into a little bit more.

Keith Haney: 00:12:32

I love that. So let's get into. Part of your framework is the blind blame, the blame loop framework. So kind of break that framework down for us.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:12:43

Yeah.

So we'll be brief on the blame loop, But a lot of times people feel stuck in their lives or their business, and they get in this nasty little loop where they blame. And there's certain things that happen in the blind blaming phenomenon. We call them the three fatal flaws of blind blaming.

Fatal flaw number one is that when you blind blame, it feels perfectly legitimate and it feels right down to your soul. And there's these cognitive biases that we have. And I'm not a psychiatrist, nor do I pretend to be. And somebody can pay, pick it apart.

But I've had podcasts or psychologists on my show, so they tell me that I'm right, so I feel better. But I did a lot of homework and research on it, so I think we got it. But there's this. Cognitive biases exist to help us.

They're mental shortcuts to help us live our lives and make decisions quicker, things like that. But they can also be very bad. So there's something called the availability bias.

And the availability bias makes us think that the first thing that we think of is absolutely the. The root cause of the problem we're trying to fix. And so then we move into fatal flaw number two. We have this thing called confirmation bias.

So once we have something in our mind that we think is the root cause of that problem, we become treasure hunters for data that supports that belief. It makes us feel better, but sometimes it's bad because it actually causes us to ignore contradictory evidence.

And we see this a lot in the world today. I mean, just go watch any news station. You'll see blind blaming is rampant and things like that. And so is confirmation bias.

We only look at the data that supports our initial belief system. And then we move into fatal flaw number three.

When you are blind blaming and you're suffering from those cognitive biases, it keeps you from seeing the real solution, the real problem, which ultimately leads you to avoid the real solution. So when you get stuck in that loop, it creates what I call a behavioral bedrock.

And it's like layer upon layer upon layer upon layer, so that really, when you start developing this blind blaming habit and you start stacking your belief systems on top of each other, it basically makes it psychologically and physiologically impossible for you to see a different way of doing something. And that's why people get stuck. They get stuck in the blame loop. They get stuck in those cognitive biases, and they don't know what to do.

But they keep pointing fingers, and a lot of times the fingers come right back at yourself, just like I did in my baseball story.

Eventually I started to think, well, maybe it's me and I'm not good enough, and maybe this isn't the right dream for me and I need to find something else to do. So I got into golf.

Keith Haney: 00:15:11

That's why I got into bowling. But so, as a disruptive truth teller, how do you break the cycle of those fatal flaws to get to the truth?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:15:21

Oh, great question. So we call it the RCD method. This is the framework that we developed to help people break free from blind blaming.

And it's a simple three step process. But remember, simple does not mean easy. It takes some time.

Now we do these free challenges where we have people come in and for an hour a day, for five days in a row, we go through the whole framework and we're changing lives. It's really exciting. And people are reading the book and it's changing their lives too.

But R stands for reflect, C stands for connect, and D stands for decide. And I'll go through them briefly. But reflect is simply centered around one easy question. Is there something else going on that I can't see?

So when you start having recurring problems in your life or you have increasing frustrations, you start getting what I call supportive sabotage. Like the people yelling at me from the stands, Come on, just get your head in the game. Play to win this time.

You know, my dad's like, look, your attitude's really poor. I was like, well, if everybody would stop screaming at me, maybe I wouldn't have such a crappy attitude. So that's what I call supportive sabotage.

So when you see that you need to start getting in the habit of being aware that you might be blind, blaming and that you need to reflect a little bit and say, hmm, is there something else going on that I can't see? And when we do this in a formal setting, we go through five different areas of a person's life and their business.

And it's not about finding something in each of those areas, it's about finding that one thing that that's really the true root cause that will cause a ripple effect across your life, your business, whatever it is you're working on, and it can help you improve. But there's a problem with traditional root cause analysis processes.

And that problem is when everybody else around you, your sphere of influence, is caught in the same blame loop that you are, it's impossible for them to see a different way of doing something as well. And so then we move on to the next stage, which is connect.

And that's where I highly recommend that people work with professional coaches that are paid for, have a mentor that you pay for, because people that pay pay attention or join a mastermind group or a mentor group that you pay to be in the room as well.

Because a lot of times people that are outside of your sphere of influence, like a coach or a mastermind group member, can see things that you can't see. For example, we recently had a woman who was really struggling getting the right person on board for a sales position that she had opened.

And the mastermind group members like, just nailed her. She's like, listen, I know you think that it's people don't want to work anymore, but you're where I was two years ago.

And I think what it is, is you're not willing to give yourself permission to grow. And everybody in the room kind of sat back and went, whoa. And then she went, what do you mean? She goes, I think you're right, but tell me more.

And he says, listen, you're self sabotaging yourself because you're constantly placing ads and you're paying subpar money for somebody who you really need to bring on at $85,000 a year basis. And you're paying 40 and $50,000 basis. You're not attracting the right talent.

But going deeper than that, you haven't given yourself permission to grow because you're scared that you're about to make a hiring mistake. And if you pay somebody $85,000 a year, they're not going to sell. And then you're stuck having to make their salary. And it was really eye opening.

But that wouldn't have happened if she was just trying to do that herself. And then finally d is decide. And this is a great story too. I'll watch my language.

In the book, we do use a little bit of strong language, but this came from a coaching client who I was working with and she was debating on. She was about to double her business and make an acquisition. And she was debating on two different loans from different. Two different organizations.

And she'd been hemming and hawing for a month or so. And she asked me as her coach. I've worked with her for seven years since she started her business. She's like, what do you think I should do?

And I said, well, I think you need to make an effing decision. I didn't say effing. I know her that well. It was just time. And she's like, you're right, you're right. We have a good relationship.

So that was not a shock for her. And I don't cuss that much, but that time I did. And so a month later comes by and she gets back on the phone and she's.

I said, well, how are things going? What's going well? And she's like, man, Kevin, you've changed my life. I'm MFD ing all over the place. I mean, my husband's even noticing I'm not him.

And ha. I mean, we are moving forward. I've made the acquisition. We chose the loan company. Yeah, we've made Mistakes, but we are doing it.

I'm like, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Kayla, who's given me permission, by the way, to use her name. What are you talking about? What is mfd?

And she's like, make an effing decision. I'm doing it, like, every day, and it's changed my life. And, Keith, this has turned into, like, this huge movement.

I was so worried about putting that in the book, but I did ask her, hey, do you mind if I use that in my book? And she's like, yeah, absolutely. I love it. I think it'll change other people's lives. And she was right.

When we do keynotes or podcast hosts or people read the book and I ask them, what's your biggest takeaway? They're all saying, mfd, I need to make decisions quicker. I need to be a more decisive leader, and that's what's getting them to move forward.

And in the words of Kayla, yeah, I've made some mistakes, but you also taught me how to pivot or perish. But at least we're moving forward. Sometimes somebody just needs to make an effing decision.

Keith Haney: 00:20:21

I love those three rcd.

The C is, I think, harder for most of us, because if you're caught in that loop of getting people who kind of agree with you, how do you have the courage to go out and find people who don't think like you do to connect with so that you do get outside perspective?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:20:41

That's a great question. Well, there's good coaches and bad coaches and good masterminds. And bad masterminds.

Keith Haney: 00:20:47

Yeah, I've had bad coaches, so, yeah.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:20:48

We'Ve had bad coaches. We've all been part of bad groups. You know, I've. I've been in groups where the. Even the leader doesn't take it seriously. And anyway, there.

There's good and bad everywhere in this world.

So what we do in the book is we talk about what it takes to find a great coach, and a lot of times just googling it, or ask AI in your particular market or your particular field, who would be a good coach. But you want to look for people that have a framework that they operate on. Like the RCD method is a good framework. Other people.

We've got coaching programs in business where we have what we call M3 mastery. It's a framework that we've used for going on 25 years to help businesses grow.

It stands for mindset, because we've always felt that we need to build the owner that builds the business, and a lot of times that mindset is critical and that sometimes that's all we work on in a coaching client, sometimes for up to six months to a year to help them double or triple their business. And then margins.

We need to make sure they have a right pricing strategy to go to market and that they understand that there is a marketing, a conversion, and a sales process to. To create raving fans. And then finally, momentum. What do we do to create the momentum to help people grow and scale?

That is what I consider a framework. And if you ask a coach, well, what's your framework?

What have you used in the past to build people up or have this particular result that I'm looking for, and they can't tell you what their framework is? Run for the hills. And same for a mastermind group. You want to ask mastermind groups, do you have a track record of success?

Do you have a framework that you work with to get me from point A to point B? And that's a pretty simple interview. And if they don't and you don't have the confidence to do so, then move away.

And the other thing I like to ask for is three references. And it's funny, because I was about to join another mastermind group and they refused to provide me with references.

Well, we keep our people pretty private, and I'm like, so do I.

But we also have a lot of raving fans who will talk to you in a heartbeat because they want to make sure that you're the right person for the group too. So our references turn into interviewees for us as well.

Keith Haney: 00:22:49

What has been the most. Yes, good. What's the most surprising thing you've discovered from the beyond blaming process? The RCD method that you're. You're just.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:23:00

You're just blown away by it was that MFD that. It blows me away still. In fact, we were. Because Jack Canfield, who wrote Chicken Soup for the Soul, sold half a billion books.

He was only the second person I had to read the book. And I went through his coaching program, and he's a brutal coach, by the way. He's like, oh, your story's terrible. This, this.

That he was coaching people before he happened to. I got lucky. He loved my book, and he loved the stories and everything else. He just wanted to work with me on the marketing.

But I talked to him and he goes, I even love your effing part. I'm like, oh, my God. I just got Jack Canfield to say the F word. Oh, my God.

So on video, I can't use it in marketing, but everybody else was like, oh my God. And he loved that part. He's a really cool guy. And I was just on his TV show a couple weeks ago. It was a huge honor. It was just neat to meet your.

They always say never meet your heroes, but he's the real deal. And I love that man. He's so sweet and honest and caring and he really remembered the book, even for the TV show.

But anyway, that I was actually going to write a religious version. I was going to write a all ages appropriate version. And we've nixed it all because of the feedback.

Even this whole church was like, what do you like best? And like mft. And I'm like, really? Because I didn't think that would really roll with people.

In fact, in the book I wrote, like my business partner told me a story of. He's like, you know, Kevin, I used to be that guy that would let somebody else's language affect my ability to learn from them.

And then I had this one coach who's just dropping F bombs all over the place.

But he, you know, he taught me that, hey, don't let somebody else's language get in the way of your opportunity to learn something that might change your life. Because when you let somebody else's choice of words affect your, your state of mind, you're giving them all the power.

And he just said, you know, I tell the story in the book because I just want to set it up.

And, you know, I'm not saying you need to go around, drop F bombs here and there, all over the place, but sometimes strong language digs deep and it lets you know that you have to do something different.

And so MFD is my actual biggest surprise because I had planned to do other editions of the book and we've canceled it because it's so popular with every single person that we ask. And I think it's true because we all get stuck in over analysis. We don't do something because of fear that holds us back, whatever that may be.

Fear of failure, fear of success. But once we start MFDing, that's when things start to happen and we move forward.

And sometimes we fall, as we talked about in the beginning, and we have to get back up, but sometimes we succeed and we succeed faster and faster and faster.

Keith Haney: 00:25:17

I love that.

Is there an ideal group or person that benefits more from this than anybody else or just kind of, you found it that universally this works kind of across the board?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:25:29

Well, I find that it seems to be connecting more with entrepreneurs or people that want to go under business for themselves. Authors, speakers, podcast hosts. That seems to be the ones who give it the highest reviews.

Although I've had principals read it, I've had people that are unemployed read it. I haven't found anybody that hates the book yet, but I do see like the self help seems to be 4 to 4.5 stars, which is a tough market to be in.

But entrepreneurs and business owners and high performance leaders, it's always five stars. Plus we think it's just because they're a little bit more motivated. But that's, that's their.

A lot of times your business is your baby and that, that's our life. And so that's what we think. But I haven't found anybody that doesn't like it.

But it seems to hit strong with business owners, entrepreneurs and high performance leaders right now. And that's who we're focused on.

Keith Haney: 00:26:18

So what's next for you? Is there, is there a phase two of this or a second part of this development process?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:26:25

Yeah, I think we've already got the business behind the book. We do coaching, we do mastermind groups, but we're leading. Even if they're not a right fit for our groups, we are leading them to the right groups.

If they're not sure where to go, we.

You know, the nice thing about having a podcast for the last couple of years is I've met a lot of fantastic people like yourself who I can refer to if they have a particular issue or problem or sometimes, you know, we've had some people have some pretty deep trauma. I'm not a trauma coach.

And we've had to forward them to some friends and, and other professionals that are more equipped to handle that particular need. So I think what's next for us is just trying to hit our mission.

And as we talked about before we got on the show, I'm trying to help 100 million people get to the root cause of a problem they can't seem to fix. And if we do this, then I think we'll not only have a ripple effect across their life and, or business, but society as a whole. So that's what's next.

Now we're trying to have an impact. The book is done, the audio tape is recorded, which is really interesting, by the way, sitting in a room by yourself for nine, ten hours, recording.

Recording a book. That was awful. I loved it and I, I tried to get out of it. And Jack Canfield's like, no, you have to record your own book.

And I'm like, but why Goes because when I did the success principles I recorded and then the second edition, I didn't have time because I was busy and people got like, really mad at me. I was like, oh, really? Okay, then I'll do it. So, yeah, all that's done, the ebook's done.

We're launching that officially here pretty quickly on Amazon. We're going to launch it ourselves first. Now that that's done, now we can focus on making a difference.

Keith Haney: 00:27:55

As a coach myself, I love to ask powerful questions. So I have one for you.

For listeners who feel stuck, whether in business or relationships or health, what's one powerful question that they should ask themselves today?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:28:11

Is there something else going on that I can't see? That's it. That's at the whole core of moving forward or moving beyond blind blaming. Because we typically are blind blaming something.

If you have a recurring problem that you can't seem to fix, you're trying to solve the wrong problem perfectly 99% of the time, even though 87% of statistics are made up on the spot.

Keith Haney: 00:28:34

I love that one. I use that in my doctoral dissertation.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:28:37

That's good. I love it.

Keith Haney: 00:28:40

Oh, that's amazing. So this is great. And I think the impact you're going to have on people's lives by helping them see beyond that place.

We get stuck because as you mentioned before, in society we see this blind blaming, this loop that so many people are stuck in, and the echo chamber that they kind of keep looping themselves into that you can see a nation and a people that are just paralyzed by limited thinking and finding a way to break through that I think is so valuable. So. So thank you for. For coming up with some way for us to examine things, reflect and connect and. And also just make a decision.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:29:18

I love it. Thank you very much. Yeah. It's been well received. You write a book and you're like, oh, this is so good. I'm a legend in my own mind.

Keith Haney: 00:29:25

That's right.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:29:26

And. But it, you know, it's very humbling to actually get it out and, and we've changed it a little bit based on some feedback we got initially. But it's.

It's really turned into something really fun and fulfilling for me as an author and as somebody. Just, you know, I think I found that successful people all have one thing in common, that we just all want to help people.

Keith Haney: 00:29:43

Yeah.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:29:44

And that's what we're out to do. And so far, it hasn't really not connected with anybody.

Sometimes people get focused on the wrong thing in the book And I'm like, well, that's not the point of the. You're kind of just solidifying what I'm trying to say in the whole thing.

Keith Haney: 00:29:55

But, you know, I'm curious. Kevin, this is one of my favorite questions to ask my guests. What do you want your legacy to be?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:30:04

I want to be known as somebody who helped people break free from whatever they think is holding them back.

Keith Haney: 00:30:10

Yeah, that's powerful.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:30:12

That's what, that's what I want. If people remember me, you know, it's already happened. I mean, it's happened in my coaching before.

You know, Kevin's helped me grow my business because we've. There's some co. I just talked to someone yesterday that I've worked with for 25 years. We figured it out today.

e started working together in: 2000

And that's what I love being known for. That's what really excites me. The money's nice, but beyond the money is the impact that we're having. That's this. That's the goal for this.

When we switched our mentality, even back when I had the marketing agency, when we switched from just supplying people with websites and SEO, which I don't do anymore, by the way, but when we focused on doing impact and helping people grow their business, which is what I definitely do now, and working on the owners and their mindset, then people started to explode. And that's when we started getting our major success stories.

And that's when we figured out what our passion was to help people grow, whether that's in their life or their business, that's really what I want to be known for.

Keith Haney: 00:31:20

That's amazing. So on season five, six of the podcast, we're doing something new. We have a surprise question.

You get to pick the number between 1 and 5 for your surprise.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:31:29

Ooh, I love that. Oh, that's a really good idea. I might have to ethically swipe and redeploy that one. We don't call it stealing anymore.

It's ethically swipe, redeploy, which I totally stole from Dan Kennedy. So there you go. Go ahead. Let's see. Well, 7 is my favorite number. I'm kidding. I know you said let's do four. Four.

Keith Haney: 00:31:51

Oh, here we go. What's the funniest text you've ever received.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:31:59

So I dated a Ukrainian woman for a while, a brief stint for about five months. And she had an accent you can kind of picture. So picture this in an accent. And she didn't. Because English, esl, English is a second language.

Sarcasm, she just never got. And the funniest text I've ever gotten is sometimes you not funny.

And I just laughed because I read it in her accent and I just could not stop laughing. It wasn't funny to her at the time. She was dead serious. She knew I was trying to be funny. And she just said, sometimes you're not funny.

And that's all. I heard it in her voice. That's the funniest text I've ever gotten.

Keith Haney: 00:32:36

Oh, my word. That's hilarious.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:32:38

Yeah, and sometimes I'm not funny. Even on stage, I'm like, hey, guys, they didn't tell you that I'm funny, did they? So I can see me coming here was an emergency.

So we got to get you guys laughing and moving and everything else.

Keith Haney: 00:32:49

So that's great. As we wrap this up, what key takeaways do you want to leave with the audience from our conversation?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:32:57

Yeah. I think the book's divided into three sections. Awareness, the RCD method, and transformation. That's what I want them to remember.

If we're aware of blind blaming, that's how we start the process, to move beyond it. And if we practice that RCD method, which is a simple formula, but simple doesn't always mean easy.

If you reflect and ask yourself, is there something else going on? And then you connect with a trusted resource that I believe you should pay.

Because how many Olympic gold medalists do you know that won a gold medal without a coach and without a team? And the answer is zero. So a lot of people, because when I tell them I do coaching and masterminds, they don't have any idea what I'm talking about.

And so C, connect with other people is important. And then D, make an effing decision to do something different.

If you really want something different in your life, you have to make a decision to do something. And courage means doing it scared. And sometimes you have to make a decision to do something different and you're scared and doing it.

But I promise you that level of uncomfortableness will make you better. And then that's when you'll actually figure out a way to transform your life.

Keith Haney: 00:34:00

Where can people find the book beyond blind blaming and connect with you on social media?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:34:05

Well, if they're willing to pay A little. Help me out with a little shipping and handling. I will give your listeners a free copy of the book@blind blaming.com.

it's just 10 bucks for shipping and handling. And yes, before somebody gives you a nasty comment, the book costs about seven to ten bucks to produce and print. And.

And then having it stored at a facility cost two, three bucks a month. And then. Or two or three bucks per book. And then, you know, shipping's five to seven bucks, depending on how you want it delivered.

So it really is a free book plus shipping and handling. Somebody was really giving me a hard time yesterday, and I had to lay it out from there. Like, oh, God, I had no idea.

I was like, hey, look, gallon of milk was two bucks a couple years ago. It's like eight bucks now in some places anyway. So, yeah, blind blaming.com is the best way. I am also on LinkedIn.

You can just search for Kevin D. Saint clergy on LinkedIn. That's also a funny story, because there is actually another Kevin Saint Clergy out there who I know personally.

Keith Haney: 00:34:55

Oh, my word.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:34:56

Yeah, it was wild. My dad called me one day and he's like, did you buy some land in Lavernia, Texas, which is where he lived? I'm like, why would I do that, dad?

He's like, well, they thought I was you. And I'm like, that's not me. So we found the guy, and it's another Saint Clergy family we didn't even know existed. My dad's.

We found out that it was my dad's grandfather had a brother who wouldn't walk him down the railroad tracks. Nobody ever heard from him again. And he adopted this family, and that was their grandparents. It was wild. So we met him.

So anyway, on Facebook, I'm doing this new influencer thing with a new book, and I'm posting stuff about my book, and there's this Kevin St. Clergy. Like, man, I read your book and it was awesome. And I swear to God, everybody thought it was me posting on myself.

I'm like, I'm not that much of a douchebag, guys. Give me a little credit. So now it's Kevin D. Saint Clergy, not Kevin J. Saint Clergy, but his son. His name Kevin D. Saint Clergy, too.

Keith Haney: 00:35:46

Oh, my.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:35:47

Crazy, wild. We didn't even know he existed. But anyway, so, yeah, search for Kevin D. Saint clergy on LinkedIn, on Instagram, and on Facebook.

That's another great place for us to connect. I do post a lot of stuff. We're launching a YouTube channel very soon.

But blind blaming.com is the best place to get the free book and see some other ways that we help people.

Keith Haney: 00:36:05

But is his son also on LinkedIn? So we don't want to get the wrong. Kevin D. Said, I don't think so.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:36:10

He's still very young. So he's like, he's probably 14 or 15 now. He may be on LinkedIn, I don't know.

But yeah, it was really funny because all my friends were like, dude, are you commenting on your own stuff? I'm like, really? Guys, I am 53 years old. I don't do that stuff.

And by the way, there's another Kevin Saint clergy out there and he's a super nice guy and he's a great dad and a great husband. So anyway, it was funny.

Keith Haney: 00:36:31

Well, thank you so much, Kevin. This has been eye opening.

Your ability to cut through the noise and get to the roof has really been a way of helping people hold back from what could be very. A powerful change in our life. So we thank you for that.

For those who want to dive deeper into your work, you can, you can find Kevin D. Saying clergy. And find out more about the RCD method and beyond blind dating on the Blind Blaming podcast.

Thanks again, Kevin, for joining us and reminding us that clarity isn't just a luxury, it's a breakthrough waiting to happen.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:37:01

I love it. Thank you so much for having me.

Keith Haney: 00:37:03

Thank you. Is that better? Is that better?

So as a direct, you know, direct truth teller, how do you break the cycle with those fatal flaws to get to people to kind of break that cycle of loop that they're in? I love those three rcd.

The C is, I think, harder for most of us because if you're caught in that loop of getting people who kind of agree with you, how do you have the courage to go out and find people who don't think like you do to connect with so that you do get outside perspective? I've had bad coaches. What has been the most. Oh yeah, so good. What's the most surprising thing you've discovered from the beyond blaming process?

The RCD method that you're, you're just, just blown away by? I love that. Is there an ideal group or person that benefits more from this than anybody else or just kind of.

You found it that universally this works kind of across the board. So what's next for you? Is there, is there a phase two of this or a second part of this development process?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:49:57

Sam.

Keith Haney: 00:50:37

As a coach myself, I love to ask powerful questions. So I have one for you. For listeners who feel stuck, whether in business or relationships or health.

What's one powerful question that they should ask themselves today? I love that. What I use that. My doctoral dissertation, the statistics part. Oh, that's amazing. So this is great.

And I think the impact you're going to have on. On people's lives by helping them see beyond that place.

We get stuck because as you mentioned before, in society we see this blind blaming, this, this loop that so many people are stuck in an echo chamber that they kind of keep, you know, looping themselves into that. You can see a nation and a people that are just paralyzed by limited thinking and finding a way to break through that I think is so valuable.

So thank you for coming up with some way for us to examine things, reflect and connect and also just make a decision. That's right.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:52:08

It. That's right.

Keith Haney: 00:52:40

I'm curious, Kevin. This is one of my favorite questions to ask my guests. What do you want your legacy to be? Yeah, that's powerful.

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:52:59

It.

Keith Haney: 00:54:02

That's amazing. So on season five, six of the podcast, we're doing something new. We have a surprise question.

You get to pick the number between 1 and 5 for your surprise question. I like that. Hey, yo. So pick four. Oh, here we go. What's the funniest text you've ever received?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:54:41

It.

Keith Haney: 00:55:18

Oh, my word. That's hilarious. That's great. As we wrap this up, what key takeaways do you want to leave with the audience from our conversation?

Kevin D. St.Clergy: 00:55:38

It.

Keith Haney: 00:56:42

Where can people find the book Beyond Blind Blaming and connect with you on social media? There you go. I know. Oh, my word. Is there really? Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness. But is his son also on LinkedIn?

So we don't want to get the wrong Kevin D. Saying clergy. Okay. Okay. Well, thank you so much, Kevin. This has been eye opening.

Your ability to cut through the noise and get to the roof has really been a way of helping people hold back from what could be very a powerful change in our life. So we thank you for that.

For those who want to dive deeper into your work, you can can find Kevin D. Clergy and find out more about the RCD method and beyond Blind Diming on the Blind Blaming podcast. Thanks again, Kevin, for joining us and reminding us that clarity isn't just a luxury. It's a breakthrough waiting to happen. Thank you. Oh, yeah, no.